I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into resistance when my boss started talking about the upcoming schedule for work because he was mentioning me not getting a day off because I just started working.
I see, realize, and understand that part of my reaction had to do with how before the schedule was mentioned I had already been imagining within my mind me having the weekend off and had formed the idea/impression that I would only work regular hours Monday to Friday and get weekends off and so within this had actually put energy into building this perception of how I imagined working this job would be where then I started forming ‘attachments’ to the ideas/pictures/imaginings within my mind of the perception I was creating about how I thought the job would be like, and in particular invested time and attention into the aspect/dimension of the perception which included think and imagining about what I would do with my days off where I was seeing within my mind, me at home during the weekend working on the computer and so also started to schedule things to do on my “days off” and so also not realizing that I was forming a relationship/connection with my perception which was shattered when my boss mentioned the ACTUAL schedule and so I experienced a point of resistance, and which was in part due to the expectance of “time off” and also due to the relationships I established with the ideas of what I would do with myself when I get my time off. And so
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to think ahead in my life and “look forwards” to ‘time-off’ instead simply being here and focusing on being effective within the moments I Live in as they are here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself to be one who does not like working.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist working long hours.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define “working long hours” as a ‘bad thing’
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear working long hours
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear working for long terms at a time where I do not get time off, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am not able to cope or function effectively within my life if I were to work every day at my job.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my life falling apart and me not having any time for anything else but work if I work every day without getting days off.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into resistance at the idea of working long hours because I believe/feel I will not be able to get any Desteni stuff done at all and I will completely fall behind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am not able to work long hours and still get other practical things done in my world, but have believed that if I work long hours that everything else will fall apart in my life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that working long hours, gets in the way of other “more important things” and that “I don’t have time for working long hours” as I must get home and do more important things, like write my daily blog.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my job and “working long hours” for the reason why I do not get to doing my Desteni Related Things or particularly have not found time to get moving on my Desteni I Process assignment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that working long hours and long terms of work “wares me down” where within this I accept and allow myself to use the excuse that “I am to tired from work” to avoid walking my DIP assignment and other desteni related tasks.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be more effective and direct in my living actions so that I ensure I work on my DIP assignment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself within my application of Self Support within the context of doing my daily writings as well as working on my DIP assignments where I have in essence place a ‘cap’ on “what I am capable of in a day” where for instance when I work, I apparently “use up all my energy” and so later in the evening I am apparently “unable to be effective within my assignments and writings”
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I work during the day doing physical labour, that this means I will be tired during the evening and will not be able to do anything productive.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wonder within my mind “how do people do it” in terms of thinking within myself about the point of how I can become more effective within my daily application where in for instance I am more directive as a consistent constant application of myself and not have this points of self application simply stop after work, or when I reach a certain hour in the evening, due to how I have accepted and allowed myself to “set up” and structure myself within and as “what I do” as my physical living expression, which based on the parameters I have given myself, have ended up limiting myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my physical living application in relation to time where my concept of time becomes a factor/element within the equation as the definition I have created this is and that governs my physical living application where for instance “I can only do so much in a day” from the perspective that at night “I get tired” and that in the morning “its to early to do something” instead of my physical living application being a constant and consistent point of self expression instead of this waxing and waning in relation to the concept of time that I have developed.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to within writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application explore and and investigate the resistance I have to “working” and to understand the relationships that I have created/formed throughout my life in relation to this point so to assist and support myself to step out of my Energy Experience in relation to Working and simply be here and self directive in every moment, no matter what I am doing.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to stabilize my Self Application/Expression so that it is constant and consistent where I am simply Here in every moment applying myself in consistent stable way, and not a point where for instance I go to work and exert myself and come home and relax or “have no energy left” but to assist and support myself to Align myself within and as Constant and Consistent Physical Application and simply removing “energy” from the equation, as I see, that at the moment I am still accepting and allowing myself to be influenced by the mind where I see that I am “making distinctions” between being at work and then when I get home and do a different task, and then move onto writing, instead of this simply being a constant expression that is stable and consistent.
I commit myself to see, realize and understand that as long as a Day Off and a Day at Work have different values, then I still require to assist and support myself within writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application to bring myself to a point of Equality within my Actions/Expression, no more accepting and allowing myself to limit myself by forming various different positive and negative values on that which I do, which is constantly influencing my experience and decision making.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to within writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application explore and and investigate the resistance I have to “working” and to understand the relationships that I have created/formed throughout my life in relation to this point so to assist and support myself to step out of my Energy Experience in relation to Working and simply be here and self directive in every moment, no matter what I am doing.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to stabilize my Self Application/Expression so that it is constant and consistent where I am simply Here in every moment applying myself in consistent stable way, and not a point where for instance I go to work and exert myself and come home and relax or “have no energy left” but to assist and support myself to Align myself within and as Constant and Consistent Physical Application and simply removing “energy” from the equation, as I see, that at the moment I am still accepting and allowing myself to be influenced by the mind where I see that I am “making distinctions” between being at work and then when I get home and do a different task, and then move onto writing, instead of this simply being a constant expression that is stable and consistent.
I commit myself to see, realize and understand that as long as a Day Off and a Day at Work have different values, then I still require to assist and support myself within writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application to bring myself to a point of Equality within my Actions/Expression, no more accepting and allowing myself to limit myself by forming various different positive and negative values on that which I do, which is constantly influencing my experience and decision making.
I see, realize, and understand that the reason I resist working long hours is related in part to the idea that “it is always better somewhere else” where in the resistance is in relation to an idea I have formed about “it always being better someone else” and also that “I am limited” within some moments during my day particularly when I am working or at my job – and so I commit myself to assist and support myself to Align myself to HERE and Self Stability within my job/working so that I can be Totally Here within my physical expression during my moments at work and not more accepting and allowing myself to wonder off into thinking that “its better somewhere else” or that “I am limited at work” as I see both of these points are ideas that I have formed and created and accepted and allowed as myself as the mind, and thus is the MIND, instead of me being here in and as my human physical body working/expressing.
When and as I see myself going into an experience of fear towards “working long hours” I immediately stop and I breath, I realize that in that moment I am accepting and allowing myself to access pre-programmed ideas/definitions that I have associated to/ formed about “working long hours” I commit myself to stop all energetic experiences/movements as part of my process of stopping the mind and so in such moments where I see a “fear experience” come up in relation to working/jobs and particularly “working long hours” I stop and breath and bring myself back here to breath within the understanding that this “fear experience reaction is my mind” and so stabilize myself back here in and as the physical where I am stable and clear.
I see that this idea that “I am not able to cope or function effectively within my life if I work every day at my job and do not get much time off” is a perception point that In fact utilize as “back-chat” to manipulate myself to remain within the belief that “this is true” Thus I commit myself to assisting and supporting myself to find SOLUTIONS to this point of working long hours where during this time, I Commit myself to in fact Direct myself to work within Solutions as ways of being effective within my living still, where I Direct myself to get all my practical responsibilities done effectively and with precision, instead of accepting and allowing myself to give attention and energy to the idea/excuse that “I cannot cope or function effectively when I don’t get time off work” Thus I see one Key within this Solution of Being Functionally Effective within my Life while I am working a full-time job daily, is to 1. Utilize The Time I have available to me each Day Effectively and stop wasting it on that which do not support me” and 2. Focus on Aligning myself with a Consistent application that is Stable, Here, one and the same whether I am at work or not where I can stop “thinking about the days when I will have a day off” and realize instead that a more Sustainable Solution is to Consider how to become functionally effective within the context of Eternity or that if for instance I must work every day, and so within this bringing to the fore the point of simply being Effective with the time I do have available to me and stop ‘waiting for tomorrow or when I have time off to do it”.
I see, realize, and understand that I in fact have time slots during my day where I could be more effective with where I give my attention to/ How I utilize my time, and that this kind of time management will be essential in relation to working long hours at work or simply working a full-time job, where I am able to simply practice being effective within my Daily Responsibilities with writing and completing my lessons after or before work even.
DAILY EQAFE SUPPORT INTERVIEW
Quantum Mind Self Awareness – Step 3
An Artists Journey To Life 