Forgetting To SEE MYSELF in my Passions – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 819

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I thought I would take a moment and sit down here to do some writing and share what I have been up to lately. I have recently started putting more time towards developing some acrylic paintings. Most or much of my focus these days goes towards developing my art business. So a big point for me that I have been walking for some time is the relationship between Art and Money. But this could also be understood as the relationship between ones passions and making money with ones passions. I am not sure how rare my situation is but I decided that I would pursue creating and selling art, essentially my passion, as how I would make my primary income and it has been an interesting journey. For the first 10 years after I graduated art school and begun pursuing my passion of creating art and turning that into my career, I never really sold much art and just found other ways to make money. My approach back then was simply to create art and frankly I never made art to sell. In fact I believed that if I was making art to sell then I would be a Sell Out and so I steered clear of that and went for a kind of purity (or so I believed) of just expressing myself and not bothering to worry about if it sold or not, though, I actually did want it to sell and I did want to make money off of it. Although during that time, even though I wasn’t really creating art with the mindset of making it to sell, I did still have external influences from the perspective of I did want other people to like what I was doing, they didn’t have to buy it, they just had to like it. But that is whole other point for a different blog.

After a time away from doing art as my primary focus I got back into it about 4 or 5 years ago and this time I ended up in a situation where I was making it and selling it and surviving off of it. Though the art I was making you could say was more geared towards a particular market or aesthetic preference that wasn’t necessarily my personal preference. And this has been quite a challenge for me to essentially take a subject or style that is not necessarily ‘my preference’ and then to find myself in it, to, Make it My Own so to speak.

I will also add here that “My Preference” is definitely something I am still getting to know and so am willing to do things that I believe are not my preference to actually investigate them deeply and see if I can connect to it on some level because honestly “my preference” I realize has been greatly influenced, directed, impulsed by my culture, parents, peers, society, ect, so I have am definitely willing to challenge “my preference” and to make actually walk that process of really understanding what it means to get to know Myself on a deep level and understand what I do really personally like and enjoy and make sure this  is not just something that someone told me I like or I thought I was supposed to like it because everyone else did. Okay back to my point…

Over time and more so lately I have begun putting more time into painting and developing this more marketable line of work. And the question I have been walking and attempting to find the balance within is, that line between creating art to sell, that is marketable, and creating art for me where I can add my personal touch and take the art in directions that is more about my personal self expression and making sure that in the end the artwork contains depth and substance, than just making something to sell.

Okay going to add some Self Forgiveness Here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear what other people will think about me if I create art that is marketable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider that one can make marketable art that still has depth, substance, and quality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be distracted or dissuaded by my fears in a way where I don’t give myself the opportunity to test the theory of creating art that is marketable but also still has ME and My personal touch on it where I can create the depth, quality, and substance that I would like to.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to develop a style that is both marketable as well as having substance, quality, and depth to it so I can be proud and happy with the work I create.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as a sell-out if I create art that is marketable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to allow my fears to get the best of me where I will stop before even giving myself the chance to explore various ways of creating the Depth that I would like into my art while at the same time having it be something marketable and sellable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into EGO within thinking “I am too good” to make art that sells, meaning where I essentially believe and have also judged others as “Just making art to sell” and believing that this compromises the artistic integrity within the art.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want my art to be good and fear diluting it through its relationship with money, but then not take this point BACK TO SELF and consider how HOW I LIVE and WHO I AM in my daily life within and without is for instance compromised by money or ultimately where I am actually compromising Myself and my own Quality and Substance by allowing myself to live in ways that is not best for me, but then divert my attention off of myself and just obsess about my art when the Real point here Should be about WHO I AM for real in real life because Who I am is what really matters.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear other people knowing that I am making art that is marketable because I fear they will lose respect for me and they will stop respecting the art I make.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that people think I am selling out.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear what other people think about me when what other people think about me is Not who I actually am, and who I actually am is what really matters and that is something that I Live and Walk and Express day by day and I am essentially the Gatekeeper of Who I am and am Responsible for who I am and must answer to myself with regards to what I accept and allow of and as myself and so I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget that Who I am and How I live moment to moment is really What Matters in this world

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up in the surface dimension of worrying what other people think about my art and if they think I am selling out when this is like an irrational fear that is actually removed from who I am and what I live in real physical substance day to day and moment to moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to influenced and directed by fear energy and anxiety energy in relation to what I thought or think people think about my art.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to focus too much on what my art looks like where it becomes a form of obsession where in I forget about ME and Taking Care of Myself and Working on points within myself to assist and support me to become and live to my utmost potential.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to obsess over my art and if other people will like it, and end up neglecting Myself and Working with myself in a process of Self Creation to become a Self that I am Satisfied and Happy with.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to ignore working on my inner reality through regular Self Writing and Self Forgiveness as a point of actually supporting myself to Correct, Change, and Transform those parts of myself that I see are not what they could be or are supporting me within my utmost potential. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget to work on these aspects of self, and just focus all of my attention outside of myself into my art, and art business.

I commit myself to LIVE HERE, and to when and as I see myself going into that dimension of obsessing about what others might think about my art, to stop and take and in breath, and within the exhale, I slow myself down and bring myself back to the moment and back to here and realize that what Really Matters is WHO I AM and that when I start worrying about what other people think about my art and how that reflects on me, I realize that here I am actually OFF POINT and so I bring myself back to THEE POINT which is ME and Self and Who I am within myself and How I am LIVING moment to moment and I commit myself to assist and support myself to place my attention HERE onto me and to assist and support myself to work on Myself and What Really Matters which is Who I am in each and every moment, So that I can stand and face myself and look myself in the Eye, and know that I am Living my Best Self and be actually truly Satisfied and Content with myself, and Love Myself.

Okay so the point that is actually coming through here, which I was thinking that this blog would be about anyways, is not so much about the relationship between ones passions and making money with ones passions, but rather when ones Passions become more important than SELF. Because I have been noticing this with myself lately where although I have been investing more time into my art which is cool, though, I have in a slight way have been neglecting the most important point which is ME and just working with myself on that Inner Deep level in a way where I am supporting ME within my Process of Personal Self Creation and Transformation and basically just working on WHO I AM in each and every breath.

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Being Creative in a Marketable World – An Artist Journey To Life: Day 776

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I have spent the last 3 and half years working Full-Time as an Artist! That’s pretty cool. I have really enjoyed it and throughout that time have encountered some interesting challenges. Although I have been “making a living” doing art for the last 3.5 years, before that I spent a great deal of time creating art and have actually been developing this art career point since I decided to go to art school when I was 19 years old.

One of the greatest challenges I have faced in particular since I have been earning a living with my art is the balance between creating art that is marketable versus creating art that is truly a unique expression of myself.

Our world and money system is an interesting thing in that there is very specific rules that one must follow to ensure the success of a business. (Or at least this is what I am lead to believe) And you know, what I have found is that these rules also seem to exist in the individual as well. I have encountered this with creating art where it seems individuals are more comfortable purchasing art that is ‘safe’ I will say.

That these ‘safe’ items sell more frequently and readily where the more experimental pieces don’t seem to sell as quickly. And this also goes for apparently controversial contemporary art as well where if it doesn’t have that very recognizable essence of being or looking like contemporary art, than people are afraid to buy it who have contemporary collections.

This has been quite a dilemma for me because obviously when you spend a lot of time creating art you start noticing things about this process. I have for instance noticed that “Art” follows a lot of rule and follows the trends of today. Art today has a very specific look and feel unique to its time just as it did 100 years ago. But its strange because I also notice that this kind of limits REAL CREATIVITY which from my perspective doesn’t follow a trend or preconceived pattern which can be replicated.

But to get to the bottom of this question could be quite a story so I am not going to go into all the dimensions in this blog.

For now I am going to stick to my approach.

Basically, I start with making sure my business side of my Art Making is stable, which means that I am creating art that is creative, but also marketable. Then from there I am essentially funding my own creativity from the perspective of where and when I have enough art for sale that is more proven to sell, or money from sold art, then I can experiment a bit, and be a bit more creative with some pieces.

There is also grants and things like that you can get from the government but even with that you are catering to a specific idea of what art should look like. Essentially you are selling your art the government or at least for them to give you a grant to create art that they think is valid.

But I really question that also because our world is really in quite a state of chaos and suffering which to me does suggest that the major systems in this world and the ideas and directions they are supporting are kind of in question looking at how everything is existing right now.

So this is quite a challenge for artists today and for artists that have lived throughout time, to create truly unique individual expressions.

For me I see this as being a work in progress for myself. And sometimes I wonder if I will ever do this in my lifetime.

It takes courage to try something new, to create something that may not look like ‘art’ but that is a real expression of yourself. This especially being so with the pressures of existing in our current money system where if you don’t have money, you don’t eat.

Sometimes I wonder if people yearn for that real honest individual expression in art and would be willing to pay for that. But then, its like the pressure of money and that FEAR of not having enough money to eat or make more art enters the picture and influences what I do.

So I just do my best to find that balance, ultimately with the end goal being to create a world that allows for that Real Unique Individual Expression to come through and flourish throughout our world not just in Art but in all things and all different expressions.

 

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Creating The ‘KILLER’ Whale – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 753

 

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The newest sculpture I am working on at the moment is of an Orca Whale. One thing I like to do is to research the animals that I make carvings of. So with this one, since I have never carved an Orca which is also referred to as a Killer Whale, I decided I would watch a few documentaries to learn more about them and also to study the shape and movement of the animal.

Now that I think of it, in pretty much every documentary I watch about different species of animals, even though each species is uniquely different, they all have one very important thing in common.

Do you know what this is?

It is THE HUMAN!

And further more, how the activities of the human is actually having a negative impact on the lives and environments of these animals.

It really is such a shame to think that eventually all animal species will be extinct because the human is unable to align their relationship to Life and the Planet in a way that is sustainable, supportive, and nurturing.

I personally see a Potential that exist for animals and humans to co-exist in harmony. But this relationship must be cultivated and restored over time.

As the dominant species on the planet it is of our utmost responsibility to ensure animals are extended the same rights and freedoms that we as humans are trying to create for ourselves. Its like all our laws and programs, and policies are focused on the human and our interactions throughout the world where animal rights is only something that comes as an afterthought and even as a reaction to the negative out-flow consequences that is coming from our inability as humans to co-exist with each other and the planet.

Animal rights should be considered equally to human rights in the creations of policies that guide our direction on planet earth. Not something that is an afterthought, but a fully integrated part of the policies developed that determine the flow and movement of our World System.

Last night I was watching the documentary “BlackFish” which focused on the captivity of Killer Whales for the purpose of Exhibition/Entertainment. The documentary highlighted one Orca in particular that developed a history of aggressive behavior towards its trainers and how this history was suppressed by the industry to keep up the illusion that this kind of Entertainment is something nice, fun, and legitimate when all the while, underpinning this kind of industry is an absolutely twisted human nature that is willing to capture live Killer Whales out of their natural habitat and place them in tiny pools, and then train them to perform for our own entertainment. Quite bizarre.

And the result as illustrated in the documentary is actually aggressive behaviors from the animals to the point of where they end up killing their trainers.

The whole concept of Sea World theme parks is a manifestation of just one tiny tiny example which reflects a particular part of our dysfunctional human nature. And the fact that this became an entire industry to me implies that this “dysfunction” within our nature is existing on a mass level, because for an industry like this to exist requires many many many participants, from those who snatch the animals from the sea, to the trainers, to the consumers who pay for such entertainment.

Its amazing how we as humans have developed the propensity for such blatant abuses, I find the documentary Black Fish does a great job of taking what should be obvious but somehow isn’t, and making clearly obvious, so that we can stop for a moment, take a step back and recognize how messed up something like Orca Captivity is and how this is NOT something in alignment with Living to our utmost potential as Human Beings.

So there is a lot of work to be done for us humans to restore our relationship with animals so that they have the same rights and freedoms as us humans.

 

Introducing New Words into Art and Self Creation – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 752

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The other day I was admiring some artwork by one of my favorite life painters (John Singer Sargent) and I wondered to myself if this artist had ever written anything about his techniques of how to paint as surely I could learn something from this.

I ended up finding an article put together by someone about this artist and the accounts by his pupils that had the opportunity to learn from him. There wasn’t so much direct written words by the artist but rather accounts recalled by these students of what the artist taught them. The article also drew from a few various other references to comprise this commentary about the artists techniques, style, and approach to painting.

In my life right now, I have been practicing and developing my own ability, and understanding of what it means to Live Words as a process of Personal Self Creation. And I was also recently looking at this specifically in relation to how I go about creating and developing my artwork.

Now with my landscape paintings, one word that I have been practicing for the past 3 years is the word ‘value’. The context I am describing the word ‘value’ here is specifically related to color theory where ‘value’ is referring to dark and light.

But the interesting thing I noticed is that everyday I go out to do a painting, this word ‘value’ is at the fore of my attention and is what I am working with and practicing as I construct my painting.

And it has been the primary word for the past 2 or 3 years.

So after reading the abovementioned article, I took away a few words and points that I could now introduce the next time I went painting.

The words were

Mid-tones

Thicker paint

Blending lines

Each one of these words/phrases were defined in the article in more detail/description so I had an idea how I would go about implementing them into my painting.

So I went out painting soon after and I began to introduce some of these words into my painting.

The first painting I did after reading the article had some new dimensions emerging in it which I could visibly see, meaning where the painting actually looked different from my previous paintings.

Then earlier today I went out and began another painting and I was surprised with the results of implementing these new words/phrases into my expression.

For me it was eye opening to see how reading a simple article on painting and then taking some of that information and “Living It” within the context of implementing it into the painting could have such a drastic affect.

I cannot recall ever learning that way even though I read quite a lot in art school about various different artists and techniques.

So I just thought this was a cool dimension of the “Living Words” process of Self Creation that I have been developing for myself these past few months.

Now another interesting questions that comes up here is how else can I live these words? Meaning, not where it is applied and Lived only in my painting but also in my life and myself.

With my painting, I had practiced living primarily one single word only over and over and over for nearly 3 years. And my paintings slowly progressed. Then suddenly I introduced more words into the process, and suddenly the paintings became more dynamic and took on new dimensions and had a new kind of life to them.

So perhaps this is the lesson to take away from this with regards to my own process of Self Creation through Living Words.

The lesson that if I never introduce any new words to Live and Become and practice Expressing as myself in my day to day life. That I will just always be the same, and in a way become stagnant. But within introducing new words, suddenly there is more life, more expression, more dynamics.

So here I can take the lesson I learned with my paintings and apply it to myself and my life and remember to introduce new Words into and as my process of Living Words/Self Creation as a point of developing and expanding and not just getting stuck living the same words over and over again.

 

SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
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Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential
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Moving out of Fear and Into Application – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 743

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So recently I had a look at a Fear I have that has been existing within me for sometime. This fear, is in relation to my current profession where I work as an artist, which has always been a passion of mine. Art has always been something that I have wanted to do in my life and I have spent a lot of time developing this point for myself. Now, the fear I have, is that for some reason I won’t be able to do this, and “It just won’t work out” So in taking a closer look at this point and actually writing it out on paper and also applying Self Forgiveness on it, something I noticed about this particular fear is that its not so much that I fear not doing art, but that I fear sabotaging my opportunity that is currently here to do it.

So I have been busy now doing art full-time for the past three years, and often within me this fear experience will come up and in fact I noticed that it actually influences me regularly in where my behavior starts to change where I will tend to be a bit more high strung and stressed out where behind this is this fear that “everything is going to fall apart” and so I better hurry up and make everything work and stable.

So what I noticed is that the fear is actually related to ME, and fearing ME actually messing everything up by not applying myself effectively, but where I personally end up not taking the opportunity that is HERE in my life at the moment, and “Making the Most of It” and then I fear that moment where the opportunity has passed and basically I have missed out because in that moment I can see within me that “I didn’t do everything I could have” that I procrastinated, was lazy, apathetic, or just took the opportunity for granted and let other distractions get in the way instead of really seizing the opportunity and nurturing it to its Full Potential.

I also see that this fear becomes more prominent when I know in Self Honesty that I am not actually Living to My Full Potential, but allowing myself to become side tracked. It is during these times that this fear becomes more prominent. And it is during the times when I see I am moving and directing myself effectively that the fear isn’t so much coming up.

In opening up and investigating this fear and investigating the worst case scenario that I fear happening, I was able to see these interesting dimensions and actually also realized that if my current profession doesn’t work out, but I have given it everything I got, then that’s Okay. The Fear more exist in relation to me squandering an opportunity instead of things just not working out for reasons out of my hands.

So I realize that the best thing I can do to support myself here in relation to this particular fear, is to assist and support myself to really Take Responsibility For Myself and My Life in a way where I can Fully place myself in this endeavor and express, live, and direct, to my Fullest Potential. So what came out of opening this fear up for myself is an actual Realization and also Practical Solution I can apply Daily to support myself in stopping that experience of Living IN Fear, and that practical daily application I can practice, is to practice really getting the most out of my days, and to stop squandering my days, and allowing myself to exist within a lesser version of myself that I know I am never satisfied with.

SOUL – The School of Ultimate Living is an online
community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential

eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime

Fear of Drawing In Public – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 739

Self Reflection, Pencil on paper, 8x10in.2004

Today, I went out to a coffee shop to do some drawing. I used to do this in the past but is something that I haven’t done much of in recent years. When I arrived I noticed that it was pretty busy, which normally is a good thing because then there is lots of people to draw, but in this case today, I felt a bit claustrophobic because I didn’t want people to look over my shoulder and see what I was drawing.

In the past, I used to go out drawing in coffee shops nearly daily as it was a great way to refine and practice my drawing. And during that time I was more accepting of who I was within this, and wasn’t as shy/reactive about people knowing or seeing what I was doing. I would just sit down and start drawing. In the past I see though that I did have a few reactions and resistances to drawing in public where I observed that some of my other artist friends were so much more willing to interact and engage with other people and for instance ask directly if they could draw them.

Today I noticed that I was much more timid within myself and really just wanted to be in the background where no one can see me. A point that I can see is also more ‘all encompassing’ with regards to the particular personality I lived throughout my life in relation to art, where a part of me just wanted to remain out of sight in the background. But ultimately I see, realize, and understand that here I am accepting a limitation where I am supressing my expression because I don’t want people to see what I am doing, and so ultimately I am in fear or reaction of what they might think about me sitting there drawing.

At first I sat there for a little while waiting for a different table to open up that was a little more private so I could do some drawing. I even thought about just leaving and going home. Eventually I went and sat outside and drew but even that was a bit of a compromise.

So the point I could see within this all, is that there is a point/personality within me that I have lived and live that is actually inhibiting me within my art expression. What revealed today, was a dimension of where I did not want to draw because I was afraid of what other people might think about me seeing me sitting there drawing. I also didn’t want someone to come over and ask to see my drawings, because I am was in  judgement of my drawings seeing as how I am just getting started with this application again.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what others would think about my Drawings if they saw them, where here I became preoccupied and distracted by all the ideas, and fears within my own mind of what I thought and believed others might say about my drawings, or how they would perceive them and me, and that I then allowed this inner reality of projection, judgement and fear influence me to not Live to my Fullest Expression, but instead go into anxiety, fear and suppression, not wanting to ‘put myself out there’ which would have actually been the most supportive for me in developing this particular drawing application and developing my own self movement and self expression as well, where I Direct me for me as a point of Self Support, and stop accepting and allowing myself to supress myself out of ‘fear of what others might think”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, when I go out to draw,  fear other peoples reactions towards me and how they will see me and so within this supress my self expression.

I commit myself to work with myself in this point to push myself to overcome this particular suppression personality that I have accepted and allowed myself to program as myself where I will supress and limit myself due to fear of what other people think where I have placed the opinions, ideas, reactions, judgements of others as more important than me Living to my fullest potential and exploring the Potential that exists within and as myself as a Human Being here on earth, and so therefor I commit myself to make sure that this ‘suppression personality’ is something I no more accept and allow to take me over and dictate who I am where I myself just submit to this personality and don’t bother asserting myself within and as Living to my Utmost Potential.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to create a personality where I supress myself and within this become comfortable with supressing my expression where now I will prevent myself from living to my utmost potential due to this conditioning of myself as supressing myself out of fear of what others might think of me, in particular here when it comes to drawing in public.

I see, realize, and understand that in by accepting and allowing myself to be influenced and directed by this particular point where I will prevent myself from going out and drawing because I don’t want to face that point of ‘fearing what others will think of me when they see me drawing” that in by accepting and allowing myself to submit to this fear, and this acceptance, that I am not allowing myself to grow and expand within myself and to really Live to My Fullest Potential and so therefor, I commit myself to assist and support myself to break out of this preprogrammed suppression personality when it comes to drawing in public as a point of assisting and supporting myself to Live to My Fullest Potential within my Art Expression, a point which I have allowed myself to supress and limit for some time, through accepting and allowing myself to be influenced by “fear of what others think of me”

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the judgements of others as real, where I will exist within a limited expression as a way to validate the opinions of others, instead of walking through any fears, reactions, judgements, other people might have towards me as well as any reactions I have towards their reactions, to Stand Up and Live to My Fullest Expression and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to FEAR Living to my Fullest Expression because I Feared what others might think about me if I do this.

I see, realize and understand that a Judgement is a form of Limitation that us humans have accepted to limit ourselves and others and that, What is Best For ALL, is to not accept and allow myself to bow down to these judgements that I have placed onto myself or that others might think about me because that benefits no one, where what would actually support and benefit all best, is to Move myself to Live and Express to my Fullest Potential so that I can then share and support others to do the same because the point of our existence is to Live to our Fullest Potential in All Ways.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit my application and expression in drawing/art through by going into a point of suppression when it comes to drawing in public. Drawing in public is something I used to do a lot to support myself in developing my skill and ability within my expression of art, but even then, and now also I will supress myself within this expression and so compromise myself because of fearing what others will think of me, despite the fact that seeing how this activity supported extensively in developing my skills as an artist. Yet, I will still allow fear of others opinions prevent me from doing this, where Id rather limit myself then face those ideas and judgements I have about myself in relation to fearing what others think.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed by Fear when it comes to my art/drawing application.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to walk through this fear and to support myself to physically practice and develop my skill as an artist and to no more accept and allow myself to just give in and essentially give up on myself and allow these fears to direct and influence me and thus prevent me from Exploring what is possible within my art expression and application.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give into ‘fear of drawing in public’ where in doing this I am actually supressing my expression and so not living to my full potential within my art/drawing application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify supressing my expression within art and drawing, through speaking the justification within myself that “its okay, its not a big deal” ( to not go out and draw) and within and as this statement justify my own limitation rather than moving myself through a fear of what others might think of me and into an expression that is aligned with me Living and Expressing me to my utmost potential.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have become comfortable in a limited and supressed expression of myself when it comes to my drawing where I essentially conditioned myself into a state of apathy and giving up even trying to live my utmost potential within this expression, but just accepted a much limited version of my potential as being only what I am capable of, not seeing, realizing, and understanding thatmI could do more or expand myself which would require me to step out of my comfort zone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept myself in a docile and apathetic state of accepting my own limitations where this has just become ‘my normal self’ and that I haven’t lived with passion, direction, or assertiveness in expanding myself and my application within my art expression, but instead just lived apathy and submission.

When and as I see myself accepting myself to limit myself within my drawing and art application where I am unwilling to move through “fears” that I have about what others think of me, and then just existing in a state of apathy and submission to these fears, I stop and I take a breath and then I redirect myself to I in such moments, commit myself to live the word Assertiveness, where I Assert myself to walk through the fear and not allow myself to suppress my POTENTIAL within my art expression, but rather to walk through the Fear and into and as an application aligned with LIVING to my Full Potential within myself and within my application in art, Where here my direction is based on a Decision to Live to my Fullest Potential and not a Decision made in Fear.

eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime

Removing My BIAS To the Word ART – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 707

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How does my definition of the word ‘Art’ influence me and the kind of life path that I have lived.

In looking at this, I see that I have placed a positive value on the word ‘art’ and that I value this word more than I value other words. And I see how in doing this, that I am actually creating a bias towards this particular point that would influence and most surely has influenced me within my life in terms of the direction I have taken and path I have walked.

So here I am going to walk some Self Forgiveness on this point to clear my definition of this word so that it is not based in a bias but is based rather on a practical clear direct meaning.

Self Forgiveness

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect my definition of the word ‘art’ to a positive value and so then when I am faced with a decision where this word is part of the equation of that decision, Instead of being able to look at all the information clearly and unbiasedly and then decided from there to do what is best for me, that instead of doing this I will always slant my view in relation to the values I have placed on the words as the information I am face with, and so in having connected such a positive value to the word ‘art’ I will be and am more inclined to base my decision in relation to this value I have placed on this word and so thus have actually prevented myself from being able to make a decision that is absolutely best for me but would rather base my decision on a preference that might not be best for me as it is not based on an ACTUAL definition of how a word relates to and functions within this reality but is based on a ‘positive value’ which has very little to do with the actual practical functional definition of a word.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imbue the word art with a ‘positive value’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect a positive value to the word ‘art’ because art was something that as a child I was good at and so was able to identify with on a level where I felt worthy and capable where for instance this was not the case with reading, and so as such placed a positive value on the word ‘art’ where then in future if I was ever faced with a decision in relation to the points of reading and art, my ‘value connections’ would influence the decision I make instead of making a decision that would be practically best for me in terms of my development and expression.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to neglect parts and aspects of myself because of having placed such a positive value on ‘art’ where I would tend to focus more on this point to the point of neglecting other areas and parts of myself and my development.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to value all parts of me as all words that exist equally, but to create a potential dysfunction within and as me through by attaching value definitions to words where this causes my attention to be displaced and influenced according to values instead of my attention being Stable, Clear and IN-SIGHT-FULL making sure that I am SEEING ALL of myself at all times and not tending to only see those parts of me that I have placed positive values on while suppressing and not looking at those that I have placed negative values on

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see, realize, and understand that I have been holding onto the values that I have placed onto the word art where those values that I created have actually created bias and preference that has distorted my ability to make decisions based in FACT and to within this, ensure that I am making the best decisions for myself.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to consider that when I do not make the best decisions for myself that this also influences others who are in my life and environment also and so ends up not being best for them as well, and so through by allowing biases and opinions based on VALUE definitions instead of ACTUAL DEFINITIONS to be that which I base my decisions on, I am not only affecting my own life but the lives as others as well.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to consider that the values and associations I formed around the word art were bias from the beginning as I grew up with art being a part of the household and so already was being impulse with a ‘positive value’ bias towards the point of art.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to release myself from the values as ‘positive energies’ I have connected to the word art so to assist and support myself to stop living out the value charged definition of this word where I allow these values to influence me and form a bias in my decision making around this point and so

I commit myself to assist and support myself to when ever I am faced with decisions and direction choices in relation to Art to make sure I take a breath and ensure I am not accessing my value charged definition of the word art but rather am utilizing the DIRECT MEANING and so thus am able to assess the information in a common sensical way equally with all other information and so support myself to make decisions that is best for me and best for all.

I see, realize, and understand how in living out ‘value definitions’ instead of ‘actual definitions’ of words, particularly in relation to the word ‘Art’ which I have placed a positive value definition on, that I have actually limited myself through by not allowing myself to consider ALL options as words Equally but rather blinded myself from so many other options out there in this world as all the various skills and fields and expressions and endeavors that one can do because of only ever seeing those things that I have connected with positive value where one of the most prominent of these was art and so often could only ever manage to see art as an option for me in my life, and therefore

I commit myself to assist and support myself to practice working with REAL DEFINITIONS of words the real meaning of the words when making assessments and decisions within my day and within my life and to do this from the starting point of ‘doing what is best for me’ where I see that even with the best intentions of doing what is best for me, that if I am still going off ‘value based definitions’ than I am obscuring the information and end up risking doing something that is not best for me because I was not seeing and equating all the information present which I can see would be the best way make a decision – to make sure one accounts for ALL points that is here, and not accounting for only those points that ones want to see and ignoring the ones they don’t want to see

So Let me look here at the actual definition of the word ‘Art’ given by google

“the expression or application of human creative skill and imagination, typically in a visual form such as painting or sculpture, producing works to be appreciated primarily for their beauty or emotional power.”