Here I thought I would share some of the principles and tools that have become second nature for me, though that I don’t see or know if many people really understand when it comes to ones ‘relationship’ with their Life and the people around them. This has served me quite well in navigating my personal as well as my business or workplace relationships as well as all of the various relationships that make up My Life.
First and foremost, what I have found to be paramount support is my understanding of ‘What a Reaction is’
This could commonly be referred to as a Judgement.
What I have found is that some judgements are ‘minor’ in that you almost don’t notice them and you forget about them almost as fast as they came up. Though that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have value in helping you understand who you are and where you are in your life in terms of how you are viewing yourself and others and life in general which could be very balanced and clear or that could be clouded with judgements, opinions, animosity, self judgement, regret, anger, fear, jealousy, insecurity, ect.
This ties into another critical element when it comes to identifying ‘What a Reaction is’ and then from there utilizing that reaction as something to empower yourself and others instead of diminishing yourself and others. So this next critical point is the point of Emotions and Feelings or ENERGY.
I find for me mostly that ‘reactions’ are usually easier seen when it is Negative, because its like it has more of a lasting impact on my experience.
Often negative reactions come up in relation to someone else.
Like “he or she is so inconsiderate”
“he or she is so mean and such a bully”
“he or she never listens”
“he or she is so smart, I will never be as good as them, I am useless”
So there is a varity when it comes to the nature and type and kind of reaction you are having.
To really start the process of getting to know this I would recommend the DESTENI I PROCESS LITE which is a free course about the fundamentals of what I am taking about here.
So this initial step is important to ‘Understand What a Reaction Is’ because once you do this and are able to do this on a very minute level, you can begin ‘working with’ these reactions instead of ‘just having’ these reactions, and then you can begin supporting yourself to become someone who Empowers themselves and others instead of Disempowering themselves and others.
How could anyone ever be empowering themselves through using judgements on which to base their actions and communications rather than for instance understanding and being deliberately directive to support yourself and another. The interesting thing, is that people don’t even know or realize how much their actions and communication is in fact based on judgement or reaction, because they do not notice when such judgements/reactions are happening. They have automated themselves in such a way where Judgements and reactions are just ‘normal experiences’ go unnoticed.
I have had situations where I have went into conflict towards others in my work place and then start ignoring them or not wanting anything to do with them, even through they were in my environment, then my behavior and decisions around and towards them were based in this ‘reaction/judgement’ I was having within myself instead of where for instance I could understand the judgment/reaction within myself and why I was having it and then taking responsibility for it and essentially releasing myself and also the other person from my “State of Reaction” so that when they were in my environment I would be open and embracing to them instead of ignoring/avoiding them or not wanting anything to do with them.
So what I do, is that when I identify a reaction coming up within me and I notice the reaction is STRONG (though this can be applied to any reaction of varying potency) I will then take a moment to look at the reaction based on a couple principles. One is ‘TAKING ALL POINTS BACK TO SELF’ and Secondy is the Principle of ‘LIVING WHAT IS BEST FOR ALL’ as a baseline of realizing that my interaction with any and all beings should be in a way where I am nurturing the BEST in myself and the BEST in them, understanding that we are all here together as ONE BODY on ONE EARTH in ONE EXISTENCE, each simply representing a different expression but ultimately EQUAL and part of the same source.
So here firstly one must become adept at identifying reactions. And then also reflecting, introspecting, or taking responsibility for the reaction and ‘bringing the point back to self’ and not just allowing one to exist in a way where “its them”, “Its their fault”, “They are doing this or that and this is the cause of my reaction”….You know, they might be the cause, as a trigger, but ultimately YOU ARE THE SOURCE, and so that is where you have to introspect to understand why YOU are reacting within yourself.
So once the reaction is identified then from here you BRING THE POINT BACK TO SELF, even if that means taking a moment to step away from the situation to calm yourself and allow yourself the time to reflect and introspect and bring the point back to yourself and ask yourself why you are reacting. I will often use the guideline of “What I am reacting to about them is actually the point I am dealing with inside myself that I have to look at” and so I use that as a starting point to begin introspecting about the reaction.
I will often do this with WRITING. Where I can kind of slow things down a bit and really open up the point so as to understand the nature of my reaction and to draw the reaction I had towards or in relation to something or someone else back to a sourcepoint within myself so that when I
So for me, my rule of thumb, is that if I have a reaction towards someone or something in my life, it is actually an indication of something or somewhere within ME where I can correct some behavior or purpose or stance or give myself a new direction to Support Myself in my Living Expression.
Its ALL about SELF.
So here is a very off-the-cuff explanation view of how I go about processing my reality in a way to Empower Myself and Others instead of Living Out a state of Disempowerment.
For more information on some of the tools and principles I use for this check out Eqafe where there are tons of free recordings giving much more in depth descriptions of these tools and principles and how to implement them into your daily life to support yourself to become the Self you would actually want to be!