Opening the Gifts of Everyday Life – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 821

bgy7n-XMelhuV-01

Opening Up A Moment.

What does it mean to open up a moment and get the most out of a moment?

This is the question and process I will be exploring in this blog to assist and support myself to substantiate a recent realization that came through with regards to how I can practice and refine my Living Expression so I can get the most out of myself, my life and what is here.

 

And this a Key – ‘What is HERE’

 

I find that I have the tendency to overlook what is right here as my life and to also Judge what is here where I judge my life and how it is, and what I have, my environment, my job, my relationships, my hobbies, my routines, ect. I judge everything seeing and thinking it is just not good enough, that ‘there is nothing there’ that it is boring, that its wrong, or broken, or not enough, and then I go through each day and it becomes a struggle in a way.

 

When I do this, I start looking ‘out there’ I start looking at and desiring something else, something more, something better.

 

My question is however…

 

When I do this, when I judge myself and my life in this way, am I preventing myself from seeing what is really here and so preventing myself from receiving the gifts of everyday normal life.

 

This has been a shift that I have been practicing of late.

 

Receiving the Gifts of Everyday Ordinary Life.

Essentially, extracting the fruit of the moment.

 

Though I have been practicing this process, I’d say at this stage that this entire process or concept is largely a Realization that I have still to actualize and Live and Express for real within my life, though I have began this process and have began settling down more in day to day life.

 

So lately I have been practicing Focusing on What is HERE in the moment to moment of my life. It makes a lot of sense to do this, and that instead of trying to go out and find a new life or new relationships, to actually FOCUS ON WHAT IS HERE as the Relationships, Points, and Processes that I am already engaged in and look at where I am not getting the most out of the Life that I have already created for myself.

 

And to dig into the moments more.

I see I can bee more engaged in the relationships that already are here but that I have kind of not tended to or participated in.

 

That is not to say that I shouldn’t go ahead and open up new relationships or points or processes. Its more a point of embracing what is already here to its Fullest instead of resisting it, judging it, and pushing it away.

 

So this has to do with realizing the Gifts of Everyday Life, where now I can redirect my focus to HERE and to getting the most out of each moment instead of thinking I need this great grand life or experience to have fulfillment, and to rather Extract from the Ordinary to create the Extraordinary from what is simply here.

 

For me I have had a tendency to expect the worst and to assume that I am messing everything up and that my life is falling apart because there is something not right or there is something I am doing wrong. So this is another point I see is important for me to adjust within myself and for me to rather Embrace the Successes in my life. This is something else I have been working with. I have been working on Celebrating my life more. And Honoring what I have created as my life at the moment. And practicing letting go of that paranoid anxiety that I sometimes allow to take me over to the point where I end up living in fear that everything is all wrong and will fall apart.

 

This Is also connected to Slowing Down which is the Words that I am utilizing to support in this process of stepping out of my anxious paranoia that I am somehow fucking everything up, and to rather embrace and acknowledging my Life and what I have created, allowing myself to See the Good also, instead of always just seeing and focusing on the bad.

 

So moving forward my direction will be to embrace what is here, embrace the moment, embrace the ordinary and to open up the moment, open up the ordinary and see what is here. This way I don’t have to go out and try and find some miraculous moment or over the top experience to experience some sense of fun and fulfillment within myself, but to rather work with what is already here in every moment which is actually quite cool because it takes the pressure off where I can now Look into the Ordinary and uncover the Gifts and Gems of Everyday Life and acknowledge and Explore this Potential that Everyday Life is a Treasure to Behold.

Advertisements

Do I Have an Impact in the Lives of Others? – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 815

download.jpg

I have recently been listening to the New Eqafe series on the statement “I Matter” and will share here what I gained from the interviews as well as how I am applying in my own living what I have been listening too.

One of the questions posed in the series that stood out the most to me was the question of Who you are in relation to other people in your life and DO YOU MATTER in their lives at all or the questions I was reflecting while listening to the interviews was “Do I matter to these people or am I just kind of there in their lives and having no impact on them or their lives what so ever?” Is that who I want to be for others and myself?”

Now this question of “Do I matter” has nothing to do with wanting or needing others to recognize me. It more has to do with Looking at Myself and how I live and considering how I want to live and who I could potentially be in this world and the kind of impact I could have on peoples lives and the people around me instead of just kind of existing as a fly on the wall where its like I am actually having very little impact on peoples lives.

This question raised in this series I thought was a really cool point for me because I have noticed that I do have quite a small circle of individuals in my life and my relationship with them can at times be very inconsequential.

I can see for myself that actually I would rather contribute some real value to peoples lives instead of just kind of ‘being there’.

A couple days before this interview I had received an e-mail from a colleague of mine asking me for some information. My immediate reaction was going into resistance towards providing the info, in particular providing the info in a level of detail that would actually be supportive for him. I had thoughts like “its not my responsibility to provide you this stuff” and “your getting me to do your legwork” and other thoughts in this nature where I didn’t want to at all put in ANY Effort whatsoever to give this info to this individual aside from the bare minimum. I could see that I was in fact having a little emotional tantrum and so I decided to just let the point go for now and re-visit it later after I’d sorted out my reaction.

So as I was listening to the I Matter Series on Eqafe and I started seeing this consideration to actually move myself to actually start Mattering in the relationships I have in my life, I saw how, if I were to actually put in the time to really give my colleague a thorough detailed response to his inquiry that I really could be an actual support to his project and his life.

So this is exactly what I did.

Obviously this is something that I have to push more with myself where I stop just doing the bare minimum when it comes to who I am in relation to others and the kinds of contributions I give to others unconditionally. You know, I see that I can also do with any kind of project I am doing also, where I really give it my all. So it just doesn’t go for peer to peer relationships, but ALL relationships that one is existing in within ones life.

I remember 10 years ago, an individual literally changed the course of my life by actually putting in the effort to answer some questions I had where this individual provided me with support that could have easily just not been given. From my perspective, I was a complete stranger and I was not really giving anything in return, and yet the answers I received for my questions went above and beyond the scope of common human curtesy. To me it revealed a genuine and real interest in MAKING A DIFFERENCE in this world and in the lives of others.

So this is definitely something I would like to contribute and continue to develop and become within myself where I push myself to have a real impact on the lives of others, where I do this not only for them but for me and for the world as a whole.

Id highly recommend this series which began with the following interview. – https://eqafe.com/p/purpose-has-left-the-building-reptilians-part-560

 

DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime
SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential

Not Friend Material – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 534

Existing as Multiple Characters

 

I have noticed that I have no interest in actually meeting or knowing about, or getting to know people. I have noticed overall that ‘I am not a people person’ and that I mostly make no effort at all to get to know people.

The other day I was speaking with someone and this thought came up within my mind about myself where I saw myself as ‘difficult to get along with’ to the point of seeing myself as someone who ‘people do not or would no like’

I mean, I have had that point in my life before where I would come across certain individuals who I found I had an aversion towards and who I thought ‘man people must not like that person’ and so recently I have been seeing myself as that person that nobody likes. Its like that entire scenario where you live your life vowing never to be a certain way or be like a certain person to only eventually find yourself later in life become exactly that which you have despised or vowed never to become.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist getting to know people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define ‘getting to know people’ as exhausting’.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to never make any effort to get to know someone, but that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in a very closed and ‘cut-off’ way where I very rarely, boarding on never, let anyone into my life or open myself up to others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the people I meet, see, know where I mostly think towards others that ‘I would or will never be friends with that person’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed some internal mechanism inside me tell me who I should, and shouldn’t be friends with.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself exist in a very closed way towards people, and never move myself into actually communicating with others in a more intimate way because I have accepted and allowed myself to define this as ‘too much effort’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself like an alien in relation to others where I see and perceive everyone I meet to be strangers and so in a way immediately form a resistance towards them just because I have classified them as strangers.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define maintaining relationships with others as exhausting and so have just preferred to form the very minimum amount of connections with individuals as possible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in resistance towards others where when I communicate with others, I keep the communication short and to the point in a way where basically I am often just trying to get the conversation over with in a way where I have no actual interest in “getting to know someone” where it becomes laborious and a pain to actually go through the process of getting to know someone through communication.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to ‘only go so far’ with people in terms of really opening up who I am and expressing who I am with them, where throughout my life I have never developed allot of intimate relationships with people but have only ever had a very small group of acquaintances with even fewer friends.

So one point that  I do find interesting within this point is why or how it is in fact that I have come to this point of not wanting to get to know people or take that step in developing more intimate relationships with people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to despise human beings

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to mostly just immediately judge someone that I see where in this judgement I create this barrier between them and myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as someone who people do not like.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define getting to know people as a chore and that in this have accepted and allowed myself to give into this definition of getting to know people as being a chore and so then resist actually doing this to the degree where I mostly isolate myself from others.

To be continued.

 

Living Income Guaranteed – An Economic Solution for a Failing Capitalism
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime
desteni.org – Participate in Forums or Search the Vast Desteni Material
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Equal Life Foundation – Facebook Stream for Unfolding Events and Solutions.
Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
Heavens Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs.

Escaping Reality In My Room – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 313

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I need time to myself in order to cope with my reality, but that what happens is that I end up spending quite a bit of time alone and in this accepting and allowing myself to believe that I require this time to myself when in fact it is quite allot and thus if I look in self honesty is not in fact based on what is best for all, but is rather based on protecting my “personal space bubble” where I can just exist in my own world and can escape my world and reality and not have to face anything or anyone.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing experience discomfort when I am around people and want to just leave the situation and go to my room where I can be alone and safe and comfortable.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have programmed myself to only be comfortable when I am alone.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I start to experience stress within myself to just want to go to my room where I can relax and breathe and let the stress go where otherwise I would not be able to let the stress go if not for having the sanctuary of my room which I can go to and be alone and away from everyone.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a different person alone than who I am with others instead of living equal and one in all dimensions whether I am with someone or alone, I exist exactly the same where I stand by the principle of what is best for all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go to my room to escape my reality.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to make myself available to life in every moment where I actually am HERE in the Service of LIFE within and as what is best for all in every moment, realizing that to demand time for myself in a world where so many suffer is implying that my time is more valuable to me than the lives of those who suffer.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to effectively apply the application of living equal and the same no matter if I am alone or with another.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as the “I want to be alone” character where in this actually compromising my effectiveness within my life as instead of taking responsibility for myself and my life I have instead just went into my room so to escape such responsibilities where when I go to my room, I have the tendency to cut off all ties to the outside world which is where I also do not answer my phone, and so here I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to rather support me BE HERE and Ready in a Single Breath and in Every Moment to direct my world within the context of what is best for all.

 

Desteni I Process LITE

Desteni Has launched Desteni I Process Lite. This is a completely free, online course with buddy support. The course material has been designed from the ground up to accommodate complete beginners to the Desteni material. Start the your process of writing yourself to freedom today.

Daily EQAFE Interview Support

Tile_life-review-of-a-dependent-personality

Life Review of a Dependent Personality

Featured Desteni Links

desteni.org
eqafe.com
equalmoney.org
desteniiprocess.com
Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
Heavens Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs

Hiding in my Room in Social Situations – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 276

So the point I started opening up today is my relationship with people. I have lived my life so far as more of a “keep to myself type guy” and since starting the process of moving into sales I have been looking at this part of myself which ultimately I see that I have neglected throughout my life, that being, being able to be comfortable and an effective communicator with all kinds of people as well as being effective and comfortable and natural at this weather there is one person or 2 or 3 or 10 or 25 or 100 or 1000, big, small, male, female, black, white, young old etc… Now perhaps I may be glorifying this point a bit but the point I am looking at is simply to become better at communicating and interaction with people, something that I always saw myself bad at and really did not enjoy.
So today about 8 or 9 different people came through the house where I was at and there was a few times where I was sitting there and in my head I am thinking to myself “I want to go to my room” this is what I would always do and have done within my life. I would go to my room. I loved it! It was an escape, I am safe there, I can hide there, no one can get me, I am calm, it is peaceful. I find I am not normally comfortable around allot of people, and today this point kept coming up inside me of wanting to go to my room. I experienced myself feeling heavy and disconnected with the people there. My brother has always been the social one and seems to be able to instantly connect with someone and be really natural in his expression with others where I never developed this point and so literally have to force myself through conversations.
I have always told myself “I am better one on one” which I do find easier but at this point I am simply interested in actually developing this point of actually having relationships with people, something that really has not been a point I have taken on during my life deliberately. Where I have never had a big network of friends and really just never kept in touch with people much. This point seems so much more natural with some people where it seems like “their thing” I have always felt it to be allot of pressure to “entertain people” lol because normally at parties and things like that, I would suddenly disappear from the scene and go to my room – lol.
So this is the point that I am wanting to change about myself and I see this as the opportunity to do that as I have now started moving into the point of doing sales which requires speaking to more people. This is also quite cool to because I have always wanted to be better and more comfortable within myself and stable while being around people.
I will continue opening up this point and working with this point in blogs to come.

 

Desteni I Process LITE

Desteni Has launched Desteni I Process Lite. This is a completely free, online course with buddy support. The course material has been designed from the ground up to accommodate complete beginners to the Desteni material. Start the your process of writing yourself to freedom today.

Daily EQAFE Interview Support

Tile_deliberately-sabotaging-my-own-change-part-152

Deliberately Sabotaging my Own Change – Part 152

Featured Desteni Links

desteni.org
eqafe.com
equalmoney.org
desteniiprocess.com
Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
Heavens Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs