Forgetting To SEE MYSELF in my Passions – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 819

1454_3

I thought I would take a moment and sit down here to do some writing and share what I have been up to lately. I have recently started putting more time towards developing some acrylic paintings. Most or much of my focus these days goes towards developing my art business. So a big point for me that I have been walking for some time is the relationship between Art and Money. But this could also be understood as the relationship between ones passions and making money with ones passions. I am not sure how rare my situation is but I decided that I would pursue creating and selling art, essentially my passion, as how I would make my primary income and it has been an interesting journey. For the first 10 years after I graduated art school and begun pursuing my passion of creating art and turning that into my career, I never really sold much art and just found other ways to make money. My approach back then was simply to create art and frankly I never made art to sell. In fact I believed that if I was making art to sell then I would be a Sell Out and so I steered clear of that and went for a kind of purity (or so I believed) of just expressing myself and not bothering to worry about if it sold or not, though, I actually did want it to sell and I did want to make money off of it. Although during that time, even though I wasn’t really creating art with the mindset of making it to sell, I did still have external influences from the perspective of I did want other people to like what I was doing, they didn’t have to buy it, they just had to like it. But that is whole other point for a different blog.

After a time away from doing art as my primary focus I got back into it about 4 or 5 years ago and this time I ended up in a situation where I was making it and selling it and surviving off of it. Though the art I was making you could say was more geared towards a particular market or aesthetic preference that wasn’t necessarily my personal preference. And this has been quite a challenge for me to essentially take a subject or style that is not necessarily ‘my preference’ and then to find myself in it, to, Make it My Own so to speak.

I will also add here that “My Preference” is definitely something I am still getting to know and so am willing to do things that I believe are not my preference to actually investigate them deeply and see if I can connect to it on some level because honestly “my preference” I realize has been greatly influenced, directed, impulsed by my culture, parents, peers, society, ect, so I have am definitely willing to challenge “my preference” and to make actually walk that process of really understanding what it means to get to know Myself on a deep level and understand what I do really personally like and enjoy and make sure this  is not just something that someone told me I like or I thought I was supposed to like it because everyone else did. Okay back to my point…

Over time and more so lately I have begun putting more time into painting and developing this more marketable line of work. And the question I have been walking and attempting to find the balance within is, that line between creating art to sell, that is marketable, and creating art for me where I can add my personal touch and take the art in directions that is more about my personal self expression and making sure that in the end the artwork contains depth and substance, than just making something to sell.

Okay going to add some Self Forgiveness Here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear what other people will think about me if I create art that is marketable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider that one can make marketable art that still has depth, substance, and quality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be distracted or dissuaded by my fears in a way where I don’t give myself the opportunity to test the theory of creating art that is marketable but also still has ME and My personal touch on it where I can create the depth, quality, and substance that I would like to.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to develop a style that is both marketable as well as having substance, quality, and depth to it so I can be proud and happy with the work I create.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as a sell-out if I create art that is marketable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to allow my fears to get the best of me where I will stop before even giving myself the chance to explore various ways of creating the Depth that I would like into my art while at the same time having it be something marketable and sellable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into EGO within thinking “I am too good” to make art that sells, meaning where I essentially believe and have also judged others as “Just making art to sell” and believing that this compromises the artistic integrity within the art.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want my art to be good and fear diluting it through its relationship with money, but then not take this point BACK TO SELF and consider how HOW I LIVE and WHO I AM in my daily life within and without is for instance compromised by money or ultimately where I am actually compromising Myself and my own Quality and Substance by allowing myself to live in ways that is not best for me, but then divert my attention off of myself and just obsess about my art when the Real point here Should be about WHO I AM for real in real life because Who I am is what really matters.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear other people knowing that I am making art that is marketable because I fear they will lose respect for me and they will stop respecting the art I make.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that people think I am selling out.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear what other people think about me when what other people think about me is Not who I actually am, and who I actually am is what really matters and that is something that I Live and Walk and Express day by day and I am essentially the Gatekeeper of Who I am and am Responsible for who I am and must answer to myself with regards to what I accept and allow of and as myself and so I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget that Who I am and How I live moment to moment is really What Matters in this world

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up in the surface dimension of worrying what other people think about my art and if they think I am selling out when this is like an irrational fear that is actually removed from who I am and what I live in real physical substance day to day and moment to moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to influenced and directed by fear energy and anxiety energy in relation to what I thought or think people think about my art.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to focus too much on what my art looks like where it becomes a form of obsession where in I forget about ME and Taking Care of Myself and Working on points within myself to assist and support me to become and live to my utmost potential.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to obsess over my art and if other people will like it, and end up neglecting Myself and Working with myself in a process of Self Creation to become a Self that I am Satisfied and Happy with.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to ignore working on my inner reality through regular Self Writing and Self Forgiveness as a point of actually supporting myself to Correct, Change, and Transform those parts of myself that I see are not what they could be or are supporting me within my utmost potential. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget to work on these aspects of self, and just focus all of my attention outside of myself into my art, and art business.

I commit myself to LIVE HERE, and to when and as I see myself going into that dimension of obsessing about what others might think about my art, to stop and take and in breath, and within the exhale, I slow myself down and bring myself back to the moment and back to here and realize that what Really Matters is WHO I AM and that when I start worrying about what other people think about my art and how that reflects on me, I realize that here I am actually OFF POINT and so I bring myself back to THEE POINT which is ME and Self and Who I am within myself and How I am LIVING moment to moment and I commit myself to assist and support myself to place my attention HERE onto me and to assist and support myself to work on Myself and What Really Matters which is Who I am in each and every moment, So that I can stand and face myself and look myself in the Eye, and know that I am Living my Best Self and be actually truly Satisfied and Content with myself, and Love Myself.

Okay so the point that is actually coming through here, which I was thinking that this blog would be about anyways, is not so much about the relationship between ones passions and making money with ones passions, but rather when ones Passions become more important than SELF. Because I have been noticing this with myself lately where although I have been investing more time into my art which is cool, though, I have in a slight way have been neglecting the most important point which is ME and just working with myself on that Inner Deep level in a way where I am supporting ME within my Process of Personal Self Creation and Transformation and basically just working on WHO I AM in each and every breath.

Advertisements

Creating Stability in Myself and My Own Life First – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 810

k2-mount-godwin-austen-chogori-savage-mountain

Today an unexpected guest stopped by the carving studio as I was working. It was a fellow artist who used to carve with us a couple years ago. He was driving through the area on his way to do some travelling.

Seeing him caused me to reflect upon my life and my life style and how I have approached my life and situation the past four years where since getting the opportunity to create sculptures for a gallery here where I live and to sell my work, that has been my primary focus for the past four years, with very little deviation in terms of my direction and pursuit of creating and building this point up into something stable and substantial.

For me, this opportunity to create art is significant and I have been really quite single minded in developing it into its full potential which I do not see I have reached by any means as of yet.

For me, early on in my life I was a bit more transient where now my focus is more on getting grounded, stable, and establishing some roots.

I suppose this ‘mentality’ or direction with my life was birthed out of my participation with walking the Desteni Process where I have been introduced to many principles which I have taken to heart and began implementing in my life.

As I have continued to walk this process with Desteni, I have more started viewing my life as an opportunity to take responsibility for myself, my life and others as well.

This approach I can see stems from the principle of “Doing What is Best For ALL” where I have began to align my life to this principle, where to begin Doing What is Best For ALL, I see this point of first being able to Support Myself and to Learn how to create Stability within my own life and so this is what I have been developing and creating and practicing.

So for me, creating myself and my life into a point of Stability is something I see as valuable for myself and others.

This doesn’t mean that I am not able to express and live and explore different aspects and ways of life. But I do see that this approach of Taking Responsibility For Myself and My life and Doing what is best for all,  lead me to focus on creating and establishing the point I am walking now with my art business into something that is stable and can support me to live in this world and be a functioning member of society. Its like, ‘step 1’.

So when my friend showed up today and caused me to reflect on my own life path. These are some of the points that came up in terms of looking at why I decided to stick to this sculpture point where this has been my primary focus for the last four years.

And it really is still a day to day process where I just walk day by day and do what is here and direct what is here and move myself within this Principle of Doing What is Best for ALL, which as I mentioned I see means firstly that I must Direct my own life and create a certain stability within Myself and my own Life.

 

DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime
SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential

Expanding Your Supply of Solutions – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 805

truck

So lately I have been walking this point of ordering more supplies for my business which allows everything to continue to flow normally. But there is a delay on the supplies arriving which isn’t the first time this has happened with some of the suppliers I work with. So when and as this is happening I have been firstly practicing not allowing myself to go into a reaction towards the particular suppliers and essentially start demanding that my supplies arrive in a reasonable time-frame. There are moments where I see these reactions coming up within me, but I continue to support myself to not act out of these reactions.

So one dimension of this that is coming up now as I write, is the questions of “Where do I do the same thing” Where do I procrastinate with certain projects, tasks, and points that not only affect me but affect others as well, because I can see that I still do allow procrastination in my own life, and so this is a cool Starting Point for me to create a Solution for these outflows that I am walking now where my supplies seems to be arriving late which has been a pattern now for about a year.

For instance, I could actually just order my supplies doubly early. If I have identified a pattern of the movement of certain supplies, then I could make sure that I am keenly on top of it, and essentially doing what is within my power to Ensure that I am always stocked on supplies.

I also noticed that I can also branch out and reach out to other suppliers who could provide a supplemental support for when I need certain supplies within a specific time-frame. This is something that I haven’t yet done.

Because if a few months down the road I am in the same boat, it is obvious that it has nothing to do with the suppliers but rather my lack of action to find solutions to the point.

So here is a good example of how its so easy to blame others for our experiences and problems where we do this without getting to the point of doing everything in our power to Take Responsibility for Our Own lives to the best of our ability.

So this is has definitely been a Key for me in the Process that I have walked with Desteni over the years where I have been supported to and have since began to bring points back to myself and look at where and how I can support me to find Solutions and Take Responsibility for my life instead of just going into blaming someone else. This has actually had quite a massive impact on my life because here even in this situation with my suppliers, this could have easily in the past ended up with me just going into blame and so not bringing the point back to myself which is a missed opportunity for self expansion because in bringing the points back to myself I am actually EXPANDING myself through looking at WHAT I CAN DO for myself and for others in terms of Living Solutions and trying out new things or changing my own tendencies and patterns to be overall more supportive.

DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime
SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential

Grounding Excitement In Daily Application – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 798

galapagos-tortoise-large

I recently had a meeting about a new business venture with my art that has been opening up the last couple weeks. So in this blog I am going to look at this dimension that I saw coming up within me in relation to this new point opening up. The dimension I noticed is that I saw this point within me of wanting this new venture, this new opportunity to be a kind of SAVIOR where I noticed lots of excitement coming up within me and so when I started looking at this experience of excitement more closely I noticed how it was connected to this idea and projection of “things changing” and within me where Id go into fantasies and hope of “everything changing for the better”

Now on the one hand, this opportunity could provide a platform for new changes in my life, however, I have also realized here that it is important to stay grounded and to support myself through bringing things back to Self.

So essentially, with all this excitement coming up, I looked at how I could stabilize myself and settle things down, and this is when I began to see this ‘Saviour’ point within me where I’d hope that this new point changes everything and changes my life. So in bringing this point back to myself, what I see, and realize is that no one is ever going to save me, and that ultimately I am the one who is always responsible for myself and my life, and so, I don’t actually require a Saviour, because I have ME and how I walk day by day.

So this was a cool point of Self Grounding to just re-focus my attention back HERE and back to Myself. This is important I see because this is where I am. I am HERE, in my life and so the BASICS still apply day to day, moment to moment.

I realize that I must embrace who I am right now and what my life is like right now and work with this ME and this Life PRACTICALLY and Support myself from HERE into a point of creating it into what I would like it to be through the daily support and application I walk for myself and my life and so thus to stop participating in the Desire for “The Game Changer” as in some external point that is going to come along and “Change Everything” which Is a form of hope I then would be participating with instead of just continuing to focus on what I am realizing more and more is the crux of my process which is WHO I AM IN EVERY MOMENT and how I am Walking Self Support and Self Creation in my moment to moment Life.

Okay so just sharing a bit here about this Savior Point that I noticed still existing within me as a hope, want, and expectation of some big event or person to enter into my life that changes everything instead of me just focusing on Me and walking the steps of daily support and creating myself and my life moment by moment, step by step and being willing to WALK THE PROCESS in real time and let go of that idea where I actually SKIP moments or ‘Jump Ahead’ through some magical game changing event that takes place.

I realize my best approach is to Walk Here, step by step, focusing on Who I AM now and what my life is like now, and walking the step by step actions of self change and self creation moment by moment, brick by brick.

 

DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime
SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential

From FIGHTING to EMBRACING our WORLD SYSTEM (A Decade with Desteni)- An Artists Journey To Life: Day 794

Satisfaction and Success

In this blog I am going to share one of the major points that has impacted and shaped my life that has come from and within Walking the Desteni Process.

I first found Desteni 10 years ago when the website first came online, so I have been walking the Desteni Process for 10 years.

One of the most impactful points that walking this process has had on me has to do with EMBRACING THE SYSTEM instead of fighting or rebelling against it.

What does this mean?

Before Desteni I very much saw money as the root of all evil and I hated everything to do with Responsibility when it came to functioning and living in the world system. I believed that this was all just a waste of my time and I told myself that I don’t want to spend my life filling out paper work. I never paid my taxes on time, my student loans were overdue with numerous late payments, I had never had a 9 to 5 type job, only seasonal work and odd jobs. I just didn’t care about ‘that stuff’ I overall resisted the system and how it functioned and I essentially was trying to escape, run and hide from it. I wanted to be an Artist and I wanted to be free from what I perceived to be the restrictions of our corporate world that in my eyes was sucking the life and creativity out of the human being.

As a result of my approach and beliefs, I was living on the fringes of this world, making just enough money to get by.

Then I began walking my process with Desteni and Everything Changed.

I was introduced to a new way of looking at the world and through the years I have continued to expand my understanding of how things work and how to approach this world in a way that is more Practical and Supportive. Not just for me, but for ALL!

And so now instead of rebelling against, ignoring and fighting against the world system, I rather EMBRACE it! Get to know it, understand it, become effective within it and from this vantage point, I can have a VOICE, and I can work to change it. This also becomes more possible when ones life is STABLE and FUNCTIONAL within this world, instead of where one is totally on the fringes struggling for survival in which case it makes it much more difficult to have any kind of voice what so ever.

What I have come to understand through walking the Desteni Process these last 10 years is that This World, THIS SYSTEM, IS ME! Everything that is HERE is LIFE, and so it makes no sense to JUDGE any part of it.  The outer world System is simply a reflection of the inner world system, and so to judge it is to judge a part of myself, and so rather my approach is to embrace it, get to know it, understand it, correct it where it requires correction. Working WITH the System is the Same as working WITH Myself.

I have come to realize that when I face personal challenges in my life, that I make things more difficult when I react, when I fight, when I JUDGE Myself instead of moving into a point of SELF FORGIVENESS and rather than fighting against myself through judging myself, I rather EMBRACE myself, Embrace the parts of myself that are not yet what I would like them to be. Don’t fight with them, Embrace them, practice understanding them in detail so that I can learn how to change. And so the same goes for the world system. Yes it may not be ideal, but if we shun it, and dismiss it, its like we are counting ourselves out of it and so have absolutely no power what so ever.

And so a shift occurred within me and within my life.

I made a decision within myself which was to EMBRACE this world system Completely and Absolutely. Embrace the laws, rules, regulations, codes ect and work WITH them in a way to support me in my life so that I am as a starting point, EMPOWERED within this system of codes and rules.

Embracing the system does not mean accepting it how it is and just ‘making due’ Nope. It means Embracing it so that I can function effectively within it and then from within this starting point work to change it. If I completely disengage, then I have no power to do anything about all the injustices that are cause through it. Not to mention I completely disempower Myself in my practical daily life to live to support myself and those around me which is also necessary and valuable.

For the past 4 years I have been creating a Fine Art Business. I have had to learn how to file and pay all the different levels of taxes. I have a business number. I pay all my bills on time, I am in essence, getting to know and understand this whole process of what it means to integrate into this system as an individual and as a business. It has been quite a process because I never considered this my strong suit and still to this day it is something that I still have to push myself to develop and learn to do.

I just finished filing my taxes recently and learning about a completely new layer of taxes – Sounds exciting doesn’t it! Lol.

To me, learning to EMBRACE the System through the process that I have walked with Desteni has had a massive impact on my life.

It has been a complete shift for me from Fighting This World to Embracing This World and how it is currently functioning and then to become Effective within this.

I am definitely still learning and developing this point for myself but I am on my way. And if I had not been introduced to this way of looking at and living in this world through walking the Desteni Process, who knows where I’d be right now. I was so determined to tell this world to Fuck Off. I was in total conflict with it, Not realizing how it was and is essentially just an extension or externalization of Myself and so really nothing to judge or fight with at all.

This process of realizing that everything that is HERE is ME, including the world system, has also supported me in embracing the differences of others as well which has in turn allowed me to develop relationships in my personal and business life that perhaps would have been very difficult to forge if I was thinking that I didn’t want to work with someone because they had different beliefs as me.

Now I am much more willing to engage with People of ALL different beliefs and simply work to find common ground and support each other from here.

So I am truly grateful for the process I have walked so far with Desteni and I look forward to continuing to walk this process to see what we can create in this world and see what kind of impact all of us walking the desteni process can have on this world to support ourselves and all here to reach our utmost potentials.

If you are interested in getting to know more about this process please visit the links below to learn more

DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime
SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential

PROGRESSION: Feedback on Living a Word – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 791

514032053

In this blog I thought I would do an update on my progress of Living the word ‘Progression’. So updating my Progress on Progress.

So when I first started opening up this word ‘Progression’ I started with looking at it more externally from the perspective of completing more tasks and projects and just overall being more consistent with moving the projects I have going on.

Then after a day of practicing this, I ended up experiencing some late night anxiety in relation to “not getting everything done” that I wanted to. Although what I see about this is that this experience was also in part to the consequence I created within my own life where I didn’t effectively LIVE this word “Progression” in the past and so all the tasks and projects just started building up. However I did have this late night anxiety experience come up in relation to “not having enough time to do everything, and so I thought “okay I maybe re-defined this word incorrectly” And so from there I more started looking at some internal aspects of how I could go about Living the word ‘Progression’ where I can also include this process of being able to “Let Go” when the evening is over, knowing I did what I could and now time is simply up until the next day.

I have now realized also that my initial Re-Definition of this word “Progression” was valid and still something I can work on which I have been doing.

So I have been practicing Living this word in simply by cutting back on “time wasted” and pushing myself to be more Directive with my Time in actually moving myself to work on the projects and tasks I have to do at the moment instead of allowing myself to linger on the computer in between tasks where that lingering actually turns into an entire event that ends up wasting time.

Another word which came up as I have been walking ‘Progression’ is the word ‘Consistency’ where these 2 make a nice marriage of sorts.

So I have just been focusing on moving myself throughout my day and cutting back on down/linger time. So this initial approach to each day has been a newerish placement for myself where before I began Living this word progression, I didn’t have as much purpose within my day where at the end of the evening I would be more likely to just trail off into the abyss of distraction. So that is one dimension I can note within walking this process of re-defining and living this word progression, that within myself there is a slight-bit-more Purpose within me throughout my day!

I have also been reading and enjoying this book called 10x by entrepreneur Grant Cardone. I came across Grant Cardone a few years back and initially I resisted his approach to things, because he was quite aggressive and ‘over the top’ and I though to myself “this guy is running off of energy and is going to crash” but through the years I would keep checking in on this guy and he is seemingly still functioning on the ‘Level’ of intensity that initially was abrasive to me. And so now as I have followed him through the years, his INTENSITY is actually something that I find intriguing. So I have been enjoying his book and I find reading it makes me want to get off my ass and push myself.

So with reading his book, my aim is to develop my own intensity from the perspective of “Living with Passion” you could say. So yes, reading this book and seeing how another approaches “getting projects done” is another way that I have been assisting myself in developing and Living my own Expression of the word ‘Progression’. Essentially here using the book to ‘learn from others’

Okay so I see that there is still a lot I can explore with this word so that it becomes something that is more A PART OF ME and A Part of WHO I AM.

Going to end tonights blog with a bit of word deconstruction

 

Pro Gression

pRAWgression

program

prog

ression

recession

Russian

Rest

Aggression

Progression

Gress

ProGRASS

Progreshshshshshshshen

Rogue

SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime

Simply Sharing – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 788

hummingbird_hero_roger_levien

Here I am going to SHARE a bit of my Life Process with you today.

First thing is, I slept in in the morning. When my alarm went off I allowed the resistance of getting up to overwhelm me and so I made the decision to just sleep until I am not tired anymore. I make my own hours for work, so it wasn’t like I was ‘late’ where someone else is counting on me. So in a way there was a kind of “backdoor” there for me justifying why I could and so will sleep in. Yesterday was a bit tough for me and so the sleeping in this morning was kind of residual point from yesterday. Once I got up and got to work, I was satisfied and it was nice to be at work and just able to focus on that. Due to unforeseen circumstances, I ended up cutting my day short. I had a bit of reluctance to do so, seeing as how I was already late, but I decided practically speaking its just how things were working out.

The amount of hours I work each week is quite a point for me where it is something I think about a lot. And something that can at times create a bit of turmoil within myself if I am not living up to the standards I have set for myself. So for instance, today it was important for me to not stress out about the fact that I was late getting up because that just creates unnecessary stress after the fact. Something I have been working on over this last year, where I practice “letting go” and not stressing myself out over work and money.

Once I got home I decided to work on my painting for a while. This was also a way I could “get a full days work in” The painting is evolving interestingly. There is definitely still a “feeling out process” taking place and I notice that that tends to create a resistance where its like “If I am not quite sure what or how I am going to paint the next part” I am more resistant to “getting down to work” but I have defined that experience quite clearly for myself throughout the years so can recognize that experience and not allow it to direct me.

Later in the evening I decided to turn the internet OFF on my phone so that I would stop checking it. My Starting Point behind this was so that for the rest of the evening I could practice simply “Being HERE” where I could Substantiate My Presence more instead of allowing the phone point to distract me every 5 minutes where I am checking my notifications. So instead, in those moments-in-between, instead of sinking into my phone, I just sat there, in my reality, in the physical, and just focused on Myself , My Presence and my immediate reality. Overall Supportive.

Then I ate chicken alfedo pasta for dinner that my partner made. Then I did the dishes and made us coffees.

That brings me to now where I am here writing this blog based on the starting point of simply SHARING MYSELF.

Okay thats all for tonight – Movie Time! – We are watching “Silence”