My Inner Correction Facility – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 760

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The other evening my partner and I watched a documentary about the US prison system. Now one exercise that I often will do when looking at different parts of our world system like in this case the prison system is I will look at what that particular point reflects about myself and how it is that I myself exist in the same or similar ways as this kind of system. And I do this exercise based on the principle of “as within so without” this principle representing how our outer reality is actually a reflection of our inner reality and that our world system is actually an outflow and reflection of our inner natures.

So in watching this documentary what did I notice about the similarities of the prison system and myself?

Well one of the first words that comes up is the word ‘Judgement’. Because in a way this is what prison is all about. It is about judgement, and punishment, although it is called a correction facility, it is not actually acting or standing as an actual CORRECTION point, where for instance people that end up in jail are not better off once they get out but are in many cases worse off because now they are a convicted felon which makes it even more difficult to get a job in some cases.

One statistic I found is that Within five years of release, about three-quarters (76.6 percent) of released prisoners were rearrested.

So I was looking at the nature of prisons where you essentially take “Bad” Guys and lock them up as punishment.

That is actually a form of Suppression where instead of dealing with these people, supporting them, educating them, rehabilitating them, we just lock them away.

I though this was interesting because this is in a way how we deal with ourselves and those parts of ourselves that we don’t understand, or those parts of ourselves that we don’t want to look at, that we define as bad, that we judge. Or even if you look at certain emotions, like anger, often times we take these parts of ourselves, and instead of investigating and understanding, and forgiving, and correcting, we just supress them. We take them, and we lock them up inside ourselves, and instead of looking at them and sorting them out, we just lock them away, and then what ends up happening is there is an accumulation affect that takes place and more and more parts of yourself are locked up and essentially abandon and then what ends up happening is you become a mess, you become reactive, or depressed, or stressed because you have a build up of emotions, and you have memories and thoughts, and beliefs and voices in your head that you have no idea where they are coming from or how to make sense of it.

So, what is the Solution.

For me I see the responsibility I have is to stop locking up parts of myself, but rather to face those parts of myself. Just as each and every crime or criminal that exists on this earth is a mirror for us to look at ourselves and see a part of ourselves and that to recognize that its not about judgement, it is about understanding how these crimes or criminals were created, so that we can change the conditions of our world system so that these particular crimes become obsolete or these types of criminal behaviours have no environment that fosters them.

A correction facility should NOT be about judgement and punishment. And so I can begin with myself and those parts of myself that I have judged and deemed as bad or criminal And to work with all my inner criminals as thoughts, judgements, past memories, pressured emotions, so they can become rehabilitated,  truly corrected, and released. To become a contributing member of the society that is me.

I can do this through my process of Writing, Self Forgiveness, Self Introspection and Investigation and then Self Correction as the practicing and Living the new behavior, the new instructions.

And so in this way create within myself an actual REAL Self Correction Facility and thus become the change I want to see in the world.

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Is Your SmartPhone the Reason for Mass-Shootings? – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 759

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Today I went in to get a new phone. I was in the store inquiring a week before and was told that the new phones I was looking for would be in next week so I returned today, a week later to do the transaction.

When I got into the store I was greeted and we began the transaction. But, unexpectedly I found out that I did not get all the details in my first meeting and it turns out that my initial understanding that my phone would be free was ‘incorrect’ and that in fact there would be a 100$ charge unless I wanted to upgrade my phone plan to a more expensive plan.

To me, the different dimensions of this interaction is what one would consider NORMAL, however I can’t help but notice this accepted normalcy within our system is in fact part of the dysfucntions that is leading to the violence, mass-shootings, suicide bombings, protests, that is taking place all over the world.

Everyday president Obama is addressing the nation about yet another police shooting or terrorist attack and from what I can see, nobody has any answers. Obama really should be a qualified psychologist because each day he stands behind his podium, he is expected to have an explanation of what is happening in your world with what is now, daily violence plastered across our media platforms.

So how is my interaction at the phone store linked to this ongoing violence and continual decline of our world and world system, and so also the growing unrest and dissatisfaction with how things work.

I looked at it this way.

In Canada, we have 3 major players in the telecommunications industry. Telus, Bell, and Rogers, and then there is a few smaller companies but this triad of larger companies basically makes sure no others can compete.

So as a consumer I really don’t have a choice when it comes to what I am going to end up paying for what should in fact be a FREE BASIC RIGHT – COMMUNICATION!

So already as I am walking into this store, I have no power. I basically will have to pay what ever offers they have available. And so as an individual interacting with the system there is a degree of powerlessness.

And so I walk into the store and find out basically what I expected. That my “FREE” upgrade is actually going to cost me money! And also, once you get down the fine print, there is even more money that must be paid on top of that.

So I thought this was a good example to illustrate the kind of relationship that leads to violence, unrest, frustration, and protest. The kind of relationship that is in fact existing between the System and the majority of People in the world.

Imagine the system was a person and you had a relationship with them. And they never really listened to you, and would just strong arm you into what ever it was that they wanted to do. That to me is not a relationship that engenders mutual respect.

Now if you look at this specific experience created through how our current system is functioning at the moment, you are able to see how over time, this ends up creating disgruntled individuals who are frustrated, and angry because they feel like they have no power, or say of how things are running, and that from their position, they are not treated with respect within and by the system but are actually coerced, enforced and bullied to basically give into how the system exists and either pay or get out.

Then you have your cases where many can’t afford to pay and so they are pushed to fringes of the world, with no access to the resources that others have access to.

From this perspective I can see how this ends up in people acting out against the system or those things that represent the system leading to mass violence, shootings, protests ect. Because these people don’t have anything to lose, they are the have nots, yet from a humanity perspective They are LIFE, Equally Valuable, Equally Capable if given the same opportunity, and yet they are cast aside and marginalized and end up in the fringes often times because they were born into their position in the world.

The fundamental way our system functions must change at a core level so it eventually will be unrecognizable. So that when we as individuals engage with the world, we encounter a relationship of mutual respect, equality, support, and all those things that are the foundation of any solid peer to peer relationship.

We have a lot of work to do. Both on ourselves. Our internal realities, with regards to our own SELF-RELATIONSHIP we have with ourselves,  and with the external systems of this world, so that we transform both of these to internal and external relationships into ones of respect, kindness, forgiveness, empowerment, and principles that support ourselves to live and express to our utmost potential as Life.

New Project Challenging My Limitations – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 757

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I began a new project this week at work. The requirements of this particular project are a bit different than usual in that the timeline for completion is shorter. Over the past 6 months and really over this last year I have created this routine at work which consists of working only so many hours each day and each week, and I have stuck to that schedule quite insistently during this time-frame.

But now with this new project, I could see that in order to complete it that I will have to work a lot more hours, and potentially not take any days off until its complete which is very out of the norm.

I had some resistance moving within me when this project came up but I was clear within myself that I was going to do it and that I plan to complete it on schedule.

One thing I have been doing to support myself with taking on the extra workload is to focus as much as possible on the moment and day at hand, and taking it one day a time. I can see that if I start to think a lot about the future and the coming days that this creates an opening potentially for projections and resistances to build/ to be created.

Though, also, the idea that the project will only last so long is also something I have considered as a point of support. Meaning, I see, its not the norm, and so I can just do what needs to be done, and what I find is that the days, and weeks and months actually really go by quickly, so eventually the project will be over so I will just take it one day at a time, and that will add up soon enough.

Today was the 3rd day of the project and my new work schedule.

What I have observed about myself is that I am actually capable of handling the new workload. Yes, I am a bit more physically sore/tired after work, though, I can see how that previously I had been accepting and allowing myself to talk myself out of ‘working more’ when I am actually capable to doing it.

So if anything, I will use this project to test my limits so to speak, and see if I can actually do it and to really test if my apparently “Sound Logic” that “I can only work so many hours”, is valid or was in fact just a line of BS I was using to justify my own Limitation, which essentially reveals the question of why in the first place had I limited myself in the way that I was essentially refusing to work more hours at my job/career, but had kind of just been coasting for a while.

What I found was that I was actually quite stuck in my routine and I was in a way, aware that I was. So thus far, the new workload and new project has actually supported me to break out of those self defined limitations I was stuck within.

Its interesting how WORDS can contain someone.

Its interesting how we give words power over us.

Like for instance

“I can only work so many hours”

“Its better for my health if I work less hours”

“I don’t need to work more hours”

“I can’t push anymore, I am too tired”

All of these words was existing within me and I was participating and implementing these words many times each week and so also living out the same schedule every day and every week, that in reality was more aligned with a kind of passionless effort. Now that is not to say that I didn’t want to be passionate, or that I wasn’t attempting and trying to break out of my routine. But I just couldn’t, or that I just didn’t

So I will see how the coming days are with the new workload and take this opportunity to push myself which interestingly is refreshing. So I work more, and am more sore at the end of the day, yet experience myself more refreshed and even stronger, than when I was working less hours to apparently keep myself refreshed which in truth ended up cultivating a lack of inspiration and submission.

So, as I said, I will utilize this new work process as a welcomed opportunity to see what I am capable of and to push myself more and to support me in getting out of my old routine.

Moving Out of ‘Hesitation’ (Self Forgiveness) – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 755

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This blog is a continuation from my previous blog where I opened up the word “Hesitation”

Why Do I hesitate instead of Going For it – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 754

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist within and as the behavior of “Hesitation” where I will hold myself back from moving the potentials as ideas out of my head and into real physical reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have held onto ideas in my mind as things that I could do and have wanted to try out with regards to expanding myself in my career, and that I have held these within me for years, and have not yet moved myself to “Go for it” but have instead lived and existed within and as the word ‘hesitation’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trap myself in a comfort zone where I have not wanted to move out of my comfort zone, and so when it comes to actually expanding myself within myself and my life and career, I have accepted and allowed myself to hesitate due to not wanting to change things up, because I am comfortable within how things are now.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to ‘brush aside’ different potentials that come up within me of ways that I can expand and develop myself where I brush these aside and just remain in my comfort zone as that which I have already created as my routine and behavior and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to entrain myself to be submissive to behavior instead of always Standing as the Directive Principle of myself where I can move in any given moment as a Self Directive Action, and not accepting and allowing myself to be less than the behavior that I have established as how I am currently living where I have given power to that behavior through allowing it to influence my Self Movement and Direction where id rather stick to pre-programmed behaviors because “its easier” which implies that I am not Stranding HERE as my absolute Directive Principle because if I was, I would be standing within the Principle of Self Creation where each moment and movement I am here within is a moment and movement of and as Self Awareness and Self Directive Creation, not something automated where I stand back within myself while my pre-programmings does all the driving and I just sit in the passenger seat and enjoy the view.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in hesitation when it comes to expanding myself and my process and life, because in hesitation, everything is known, and predictable and I will not have to face unknown situations or people or places or things in my reality where then I will have to be HERE and Clear so that I can see clearly these New things and understand how to interact with them where I cannot just repeat automated behaviors that were designed for some other situation but will have to face new situations and expand who I am and how I handle these new situations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist facing new situations and new people, and that I accepted and allowed myself to hesitate and become stagnant within my self development and expansion of myself through by not moving myself to face new and unknown situations and people and then within this learning how to navigate and express and direct within these new situations and in relation to these new people.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist for years within the behavior pattern of Hesitation and in this became stagnant instead of Expansive and Creative with myself, all because I preferred existing on autopilot where I know what I am getting, and in this compromised my Self Growth and Self Development through never entering into new situations, and facing new people and processes and systems and in this learning new ways of being and interacting and expressing and directing myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist learning new systems

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear living without a system, where for instance if I am faced with meeting a new person, I will have to stand in the moment and interact with them in the moment, where if I always just stick to interacting with the same people, I know what to expect and so I can relax a bit because there is less likely to be something unexpected come up that may challenge me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Live out the word Hesitation in relation to “trying new things out” because of a resistance I have of facing new situations and systems where I will actually have to put in the work to understand how to interact, and function within new environments, and that I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to just “not bother expanding” and so giving in to the resistance of moving myself to understand new environments and within this stagnated myself within my life and self expression and creation process.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to embrace new things, new systems, new environments, new people, seeing, realizing and understanding that it will require Self Direction to embrace and make these new things a part of my life where I will have to understand and learn new information and ways of doing things and that this is actually cool and indicates a point of self growth and self expansion.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider that to expand myself, that this will require me to MOVE myself physically into new situations, opportunities, environments and to interact with new people, where this will not just happen on its own or ‘naturally’ because it is new, and I will have to learn how to do it and also within this I will have to move through the resistance of moving out of the known and programmed and into the unknown and within this learn, grow and expand to encompass something else other than what I already know.

To be continued with Self Commitment Statements.

SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime

Why do I Hesitate instead of Going For It! – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 754

What Do They Think About Me.

What I have noticed about myself is that I have many many ideas in my head of what I would like to do. From a certain perspective these ideas can also be seen as different potentials. Now, I have observed that one word in particular that I have been existing within and Living out when it comes to these potentials is the word ‘Hesitation’

And as a result these different possible potentials in my mind continue to remain in the mind instead of me, moving myself to create these potentials into real physical manifestations through applying myself in real space and time to materialize these potentials and make them real.

Now in terms of these potentials, a lot of them exist in relation to my career as possible ways, methods, avenues, I could develop or expand, though I have held some of these potentials in my head for literally years, and not moved them out of my head and into reality.

Now part of writing out this blog right now is to actually support me within this process of SELF MOVEMENT instead of Hesitation. And to actually dare to try out some of these ideas.

There is that dimension of ‘comfortability’ intertwined into this word hesitation, where I do see that if I were to actually endeavor to try out some of these potentials that have been in my head for so long, or even just come up in a moment which seem like awesome ideas but then I in the moment of moving on them, stop, and pause, and think, mmmmm, naaawwwww, and just brush it aside, I see that the dimension of ‘comfortability’ is about the point of moving out of my comfort zone and trying out something new.

I can also see that in trying something new, I will have to do things I have never done before. I might have to interact with someone I have never done before, I might have to learn a new way or system or structure of doing things, and I see that much of the time, I hesitate at this juncture of being faced with ‘learning something new’ with ‘having to walk and understand a new system’ or path. And so, I never open up any new paths for myself, and I just stick to current MOLD, which is OLD, yet, because I know how to do it, and it has become automated in a way, I know what to expect, I know what rewards will come from it, and its easy.

I see that I hesitate because I resist doing/learning/walking new paths, ways, systems.

I see that I hesitate because its easier to just stick with the current mOLD which is already automated and I know what to expect

I see that I hesitate because of a belief that its not going to work.

Now this last point I haven’t gotten to much into yet. This belief that “its not going to work out” is what I see as how I have programmed myself to think about things, where I have in a way conditioned myself to believe that things aren’t going to work out. Or at least I can tell myself that that is why I am not moving forward when maybe, again, its more about just not wanting to break the mOLD and  move myself in something NEW because to do that, It will require more effort and self direction.

I do see that I will often talk myself out of something before I even start. But again, what is the reason I do this? What is the reason why I have become more willing to talk myself out of something than GOING FOR IT.

I do see a fear of failure there. A fear of rejection. And so I talk myself out of it instead of going for it. Because I fear being rejected for my new idea, or for what I am bringing to the table.

And this relates to the idea of PERMISSION which I actually started to write this blog about but then moved into writing about HESITATION.

So the relationship between the fear of rejection and permission is based on an idea that I need and require others to approve of what I do before I do it. Now what is also interesting here is that I see a dimension of this point of permission is centered around SPECULATION only where I will for instance not act or move on an idea if someone else’s opinion thinks its not a good idea, even if I see it could possibly work, where I would rather trust someone else’s opinion rather than dare to trust myself and go for it.

Okay so this word Permission is an entire topic unto itself so I will pause here. What I normally do with writings like this, is that I will either continue opening them up here in blogs, or I will continue with them in my own personal writings. I opened up a lot of cool dimensions here on this point, though I do see it necessary to walk what I have opened up into a Solution through applying Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Statements so to give myself some Direction in correcting this part of myself so that I no longer exist within this application of allowing myself to hesitate and hold back when it comes to the different potentials I see I could express in my life.

 

SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime

Creating The ‘KILLER’ Whale – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 753

 

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The newest sculpture I am working on at the moment is of an Orca Whale. One thing I like to do is to research the animals that I make carvings of. So with this one, since I have never carved an Orca which is also referred to as a Killer Whale, I decided I would watch a few documentaries to learn more about them and also to study the shape and movement of the animal.

Now that I think of it, in pretty much every documentary I watch about different species of animals, even though each species is uniquely different, they all have one very important thing in common.

Do you know what this is?

It is THE HUMAN!

And further more, how the activities of the human is actually having a negative impact on the lives and environments of these animals.

It really is such a shame to think that eventually all animal species will be extinct because the human is unable to align their relationship to Life and the Planet in a way that is sustainable, supportive, and nurturing.

I personally see a Potential that exist for animals and humans to co-exist in harmony. But this relationship must be cultivated and restored over time.

As the dominant species on the planet it is of our utmost responsibility to ensure animals are extended the same rights and freedoms that we as humans are trying to create for ourselves. Its like all our laws and programs, and policies are focused on the human and our interactions throughout the world where animal rights is only something that comes as an afterthought and even as a reaction to the negative out-flow consequences that is coming from our inability as humans to co-exist with each other and the planet.

Animal rights should be considered equally to human rights in the creations of policies that guide our direction on planet earth. Not something that is an afterthought, but a fully integrated part of the policies developed that determine the flow and movement of our World System.

Last night I was watching the documentary “BlackFish” which focused on the captivity of Killer Whales for the purpose of Exhibition/Entertainment. The documentary highlighted one Orca in particular that developed a history of aggressive behavior towards its trainers and how this history was suppressed by the industry to keep up the illusion that this kind of Entertainment is something nice, fun, and legitimate when all the while, underpinning this kind of industry is an absolutely twisted human nature that is willing to capture live Killer Whales out of their natural habitat and place them in tiny pools, and then train them to perform for our own entertainment. Quite bizarre.

And the result as illustrated in the documentary is actually aggressive behaviors from the animals to the point of where they end up killing their trainers.

The whole concept of Sea World theme parks is a manifestation of just one tiny tiny example which reflects a particular part of our dysfunctional human nature. And the fact that this became an entire industry to me implies that this “dysfunction” within our nature is existing on a mass level, because for an industry like this to exist requires many many many participants, from those who snatch the animals from the sea, to the trainers, to the consumers who pay for such entertainment.

Its amazing how we as humans have developed the propensity for such blatant abuses, I find the documentary Black Fish does a great job of taking what should be obvious but somehow isn’t, and making clearly obvious, so that we can stop for a moment, take a step back and recognize how messed up something like Orca Captivity is and how this is NOT something in alignment with Living to our utmost potential as Human Beings.

So there is a lot of work to be done for us humans to restore our relationship with animals so that they have the same rights and freedoms as us humans.

 

Living Words – ‘CLEAR’ – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 744

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So tonight is one of those nights where I have been wanting to write a blog, and I have been thinking about different possibilities to the point where now my going off in different directions and potentials inside myself and can’t seem to settle on something.

So, I will just begin the blog as a point of getting myself grounded and here and see what opens up.

How about something different.

Today I am living the word….mmmmm…….dang, what is it……oh yes, “Planning”. I have recently began testing out the process of Living a New Word Each Day as a point of Self Creation. And today was the word “Planning” and a couple days ago I lived the word “New” So, today I will reach back into the past and snatch this word “New” and Live this word by writing something that isn’t so typical for me to write about.

Well, how about I write about this process of Living Words.

For me this is the first time I have been more active and consistent with taking a word each day and living it.

And so far it has been interesting, sometimes frustrating, and overall, a process that I see is supportive and will continue to explore, expand and develop, because I realize that this process of Living Words is like anything else where its not perfect in the beginning and sometimes there is growing pains but that is just how things go when you are learning something new.
Basically, I pick a new word each evening, and then define for myself how I will live that word the next day. Sometimes I do this in writing, or I will discuss it with my partner,  and what I noticed is that usually there is like one clear application that I can see how to apply a word. Sometimes the application is an ‘inner’ application, like letting go of self judgment in a moment when I see it comes up, or it is an ‘outer’ application, like for instance in Living the word ‘Planning’ today, I phoned ahead and arranged to have my car picked up tomorrow morning at 8am.

What I see is that there is various dimensions and contexts in which to live words.

Tomorrow my word I am going to Live is the word ‘Clear’.

I decided on this word because being Clear is something that I would like to be, and eventually Stand within in an absolute sense. Yesterday I wasn’t clear with myself and ended up in patterns and behaviors and experiences, that I know does not represent the best of me. So the word for tomorrow will be the word  ‘Clear’. Within this I can assist and support myself to not accept and allow thoughts, backchats, internal chatter that I see is not supportive for me so will support myself to practice remaining clear and here, and not clouded up with thoughts, and inner backchat.

Within this I commit myself to support me to push myself to ‘remain with my physical body’ instead of going into rabbit hole thought patterns that only take me into the mind and into preoccupation. So being Clear, is Standing Here with the Physical Body where I am aware of myself and aware of my breath, and aware of the depths and subtleties of my physical body. If I am in my mind participating in my own inner chatter or getting caught up in emotional experiences, I will not be able to see what is going on within and as my body or my awareness. So being Clear, Clears the air so I can see. Like looking across a clear lake, you can see far into the distance, and you can hear a fish jump a mile away because all is calm and all is clear.

I can also see the word ‘Clean’ within the word Clear, and so another dimension of the word Clear is the words ‘Clean’, and ‘Cleanliness’. So to Live the word clear is also to mean, not clogging up my body with unhealthy foods or actions which inhibit or supress the body’s natural expression, but rather to keep it clear and clean. For instance sitting on the couch in couch potato mode I see does not support me to be here and clear.

So I have opened up a few dimensions of this word Clear, which I will practice Living tomorrow and see what else comes up.

Oh, I just saw one more point – Clearing my desk, or making sure my workspace is clear, that is another cool application I can direct tomorrow as well.

Okay that’s all for now.