This is the 4th blog in my series on Resistance. You can read the other blogs here.
Resistance in Relationships.
Here I am continuing with my series of blogs that I am doing on Resistance where I am exploring this point and sharing from my own life what I have faced and have come to see, realize, and understand about the experience of Resistance and in this blog I will be looking specifically at the experience of Resistance in relationships.
Resistance is something that affects many of us, most of us, maybe ALL of us, daily. The resistance I have been speaking about in my blog series on resistance is more in relation to an experience that takes place inside us. An experience of resistance that comes up in relation to so many things in our lives. Work, friends, responsibilities, relationships, sex, self improvement, doing the dishes, making your bed, going to college, changing careers, from the big to the small and back again, resistance is like the silent hand that is, in a way, sabotaging our lives, our potentials, because we have made resistance our trusted companion and have become accustom to using this experience to validate and inform the decisions we make day to day.
So here I am going to share about my experience of resistance with regards to Relationships. Until I started to face this point, I didn’t even realize one could have resistance towards relationships. I mean, I was still early on in my process of really understanding what happens when human beings make choices. I always just kind of assumed I made choices freely and that they were legitimate, discerning, and often right. I did not even notice this little thing called resistance that was silently walking with me, nudging me this way and that, and ultimately shaping the life I was creating for myself and also how this manifested within the context of relationships in terms of when you meet someone and want to enter a relationship with them for companionship, sex, sharing, ect.
I was first faced with this….or rather I first became aware of this relationship resistance point when after I was introduced to the concept of picking a relationship partner where this choice was not something based on ‘attraction’. Now if you look here, ‘attraction’ as we often experience towards others who we are ‘interested in’ is actually the opposite of resistance in a way. You have the ‘positive energy’ as ‘attraction’ and then you have the reverse ‘negative energy’ as ‘resistance’.
So when I was introduced to this concept of picking a partner where this was not merely based on ‘attraction’ I started to consider this for myself and I started to really look at this point for myself, I looked at all my past relationships, and people I was interested in, and I noticed that they all had that one primary point at the forefront; ATTRACTION. So then what does this mean to pick a partner where this is not the primary motivating factor?
So as I continue this series, I will draw from my personal experience and in my next blog in this series, I will share about my experience within walking into a relationship/agreement where it was not done how I had normally done it in the past where this decision was primarily based on the point of attraction. And I will share about my experience within doing this and the point(s) of resistance that emerged as I was walking this point, and also looking at where I am now within this particular process.
For Support when facing Resistance in Relationships please visit the links below