Here I am applying Self Forgiveness on the Points that I opened up in my blog yesterday
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow the decision to take a new/different direction in my life sink away into the background where I will accept and allow my already pre-programmed automated behavior patterns to take over and take up all the space and time I have in each day in where here I am not Directing myself to incorporate and implement any new behaviors, actions associated with taking a new direction in my life after I had decided that this is something that I would like to do and so here never actually expanding myself within and as myself and my reality because I just end up repeating the same automated actions and behaviors over and over each day and thus accept and allow the ‘New Point’ which I had decided to make a part of my life sink into the background in a way being drown out by my currently existing automated life pattern and so thus here not effectively Direct myself to in fact Change Myself as the Expansion of myself within incorporating walking and living new behaviors and patterns and actions in my day to day life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the new point I am considering is ‘beyond me’ meaning that it is not something that will actually work or that I will be able to do and so here have accepted and allowed myself to use this idea that “I will not be able to do it” as a justification to not deliberately direct myself each day within the necessary tasks and actions to establish the new point within my life as a stable point that is HERE.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe within myself that “in the end I won’t actually change, and I won’t actually be able to implement anything new into my life in a substantial way”.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to incorporate this ‘new point’ into and as myself and my life through by realizing here that to do this must be a Deliberate Action and Actions done consistently in order to in fact ‘re-program’ myself and my life to now incorporate this new point. Within doing this I see that my patterns will change because now I will be incorporating new tasks and patterns into my daily living.
I commit myself to realize that in order to replace ‘automatic behaviors’ with new behaviors I will have to Will myself within and as by taking Deliberate Structured Action Consistently Daily so to carve out a part of my life dedicated to this new task.
I commit myself to see, realize, and understand that I must make time for this new point through by being DELIBERATE in my Actions instead of being Automatic in my actions where I just accept and allow things to play out as usual where I am not really directing myself or am the driver of myself as my self movement throughout the day but am more like a passenger just along for the ride acting out all the pre-programmed automated behaviors, actions, and ways of being, feeling ect, that I have accepted and allowed myself to create as myself and so here within changing this, I must move myself over to the drivers side and actually Deliberately steer and drive myself and make sure I am studying and refining the map so that my Direction is Deliberate and Specific.
So here ultimately I commit myself to assist and support myself to not allow my decision to incorporate a new point into my life just sink back into the background like I have accepted and allowed before but rather to assist and support myself here to walk with this “New Point” in a much more Deliberate and Self Aware stand point, meaning where I commit myself to really making sure that this time I am Specific and Directive within this “new point” because I have seen this point come and go many times which is indicating that I have yet to give it specific direction through by making a DECISION To commit myself to assist and support myself to do this where one practical way I see I can do this is through by allocating a specific amount of time/hours that I dedicate to this weekly where I see that previously I did not do that effectively enough and then sure enough the point just faded away.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to dedicate a specific amount of time to this “new point” each week/day so to ensure that I am working with the point actively in a structured way to ensure that there is movement and direction taking place as an accumulative process of and as step by step actions and attention that I give to the point to in fact test the practicality and effectiveness of this point instead of just giving this point random attention at random times and then thinking “ok well its not really working” as the point eventually fade into the background due to me not in fact making the decision to be as Directive and Deliberate as I am able to and that is in fact NECESSARY within walking and testing/implementing a point into myself and my reality effectively.
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