Moving Through Boredom – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 611


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give credence to the experience of resistance that came up today at work instead in such moments, taking a breath and willing myself to give back my full attention to the task at hand, in this stopping the acceptance and allowance of participating even slightly with thoughts about stopping and doing something else or thinking “this is hard” and other thoughts/points within my mind of this nature.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to entertain the back-chats that was coming up inside of me in relation to the experience I was having within myself of ‘not wanting to continue working anymore’. And in entertaining these back-chats such as “I’m bored” or “this is so boring” or “I am not going to be able to get through this” I effectively fueled my own experience of resistance, making it worse, and thus creating my own difficulty in continuing with my work and so here I forgive myself for not realizing that this experience that I was having was being created by me through accepting and allowing myself to participate within the various emotions, feelings, thoughts, words, within myself that was coming up in relation to ‘continuing working’ instead of taking a Self Directive Stance and not allowing myself to entertain the experience of resistance that I was having.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to when and as I see myself going into this experience of ‘extreme boredom’ in relation to that which I am doing, particularly when I am at work working on projects, that in such moments when I see this experience coming up within and as me, I stop and I take a breath, and I stop the experience from the perspective of accepting and allowing myself to focus on it and in a way go more and more into it. Rather I bring myself back Here to the moment within and as the silence of the physical, out of the distractions and chatter of the mind, and Here Direct Myself to Move myself within the project I am working on from the starting point of actually really moving/directing myself effectively within this.

I here also commit myself to not accept and allow myself to “kind of be working and kind of not” as I see that this is in fact a side-effect of allowing my ‘boredom experience’ to direct me, and so here I commit myself to direct myself to ensure that I am fully engaging in my actions while as I am working, meaning where I push myself to bring my full attention, capacity, and ability Here and to thus express me as this as a Self Directed Decision and Act.

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