I was looking at the point of “when did I decide to be an Artist” or that “I wanted to be an Artist at all”. I was looking at this decision I made within the context of “Free-Choice” because you’d think that if one end up as an Artist that that is something that would in a way require more of a “free choice” than your more “normal system jobs”. So you’d think that to become an artist must have to a degree been a decision made by an individual who has decided to “make decisions for themselves”
However what I have noticed is that for instance, I grew up in a household where art and creative expression was something that was more part of the dialog of the household.
If I was raised in a household where for instance my mother and father were engineers and that this was more part of my daily dialog that this would have been part of my awareness for which I could have thus then included into the decision I would eventually make about “what I will be when I grow up”
How many jobs exist in this world, and furthermore, how many jobs did I not even know existed before I made my decision to be an artist or go into the arts.
How could I have had free choice if I only had a limited view and understanding of what is available to me to choose from. I likely had no idea that something like an engineer or a building developer or a financial analyst or a politician even existed. My “choice” to become an artist was based on a very limited scope of information thus choices that existed within the confines of my family structure.
If I see my parents placing value in Art and or having judgments or opinions towards other areas where one would earn ones livelihood then as the child I would have likely formed those same biases upon which I would eventually exercise my “free choice” to pursue a life in the arts…but really, was there any doubt that I would have chosen anything other than to be an Artist.
My question to myself is – When did I actually decide to be an Artist and was this really ME making this decision or was this simply who I had accepted myself to be as who we all accept ourselves to be as the by-products of the generations that have gone before us where we simply accept the same value systems and thus basing our decisions, how we treat others, and how we live our lives on this generational ideology that is imprinted onto us through our environment as we are being raised.
I almost certainly would have been an engineer if I grew up in a family of engineers – so was my choice to be an Artist really mine – No, it wasn’t.
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