Accustomed to Anxiety – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 458

Cycles of Collapse, 9.5x11inch graphite on paper, Andrew Gable

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am not stable enough to create stability within my life and so in this belief only allow myself to exist within stability to-a-degree where eventually I will stop being stable and go into my mind, into anxiety, into despair, in reactions where this has become a pattern that I live, not allowing myself to remain Stable today, tomorrow and yesterday, day in and day out but always resorting to anxiety as that which I am used to, as that which I am familiar with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as having and being capable of existing within only a certain degree of stability where in this I do not allow myself to walk in and as consistency within and as Self Stability from the perspective of where I am Here, walking in breath, and directing myself in and as the physical instead of existing within a state of anxiety, or reaction, where essentially I allow myself to go into my mind and become unstable and reactive within my reality, and so thus never developing an effective Self Stability within and as myself for me to then assist and support myself to stabilize my world where I am consistent in my actions and also able to be more clear in my insight and assessment of my reality because instead of being in my mind participating in endless streams of thoughts, worries, projections, I am simply here directing myself in the physical and so not lost in the whirlwind of and as the mind as emotions, feelings, thoughts which inhibit me from seeing anything clearly.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to assume that the points within my life that I try, will fail, because that is what I am used to, and that within this I have ended up creating an expectation and thus projection of “this is failing” onto various points within my life, where I have come to trust my projection rather than the practical physical reality assessment of how things are actually going.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to insist that “things are not going to work” pretty much with what ever I try, particularly if this thing in some way benefit me or is something that I would like to do, and so to within participating withing this belief, create anxiety within myself towards what ever it is I am doing, as I am always expecting and believing the point will not work which consequentially creates a point of emotional stress and anxiety

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to assume that “things will always fall apart” and to thus hold this idea within myself in relation to what ever it is I am doing believing actually that this idea is “the real reality” even when I have come to see and understand that it is not “the real reality” but just my opinion about reality that I have accepted as truth and within this end up creating and constructing my actual experience of myself around which often is saturated with anxiety due to holding onto the idea all the time that “things will most certainly fall apart”

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to stop for a moment and simply be here with myself, realizing that I do not have to constantly be “figuring everything out in my head at all times” and that its ok that I take a breath and stop trying to figure everything out all the time, and just breathe and be here with myself in Silence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have become accustom to an experience of anxiety within myself/my physical all the time and so will in a way just automatically participate within thoughts, and thinking in my mind and generate this experience of anxiety, believing that “this anxiety is just normal” and “is something I just must live with everyday” and so here I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the anxiety I experience within myself is something that “I just must live with daily” not accepting and allowing myself to consider that I am able to stop this anxiety and simply walk in Self Stability here in breath, where I am not always existing in a state of anxiety and fear towards the various parts of my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that the/an experience of anxiety is necessary for me to manage and navigate my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that it is impossible to exist within my life without anxiety, and so thus have never considered myself able to walk in my day and doing what I normally do but without the “constant state of anxiety” that seem to be there in every moment.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to take Self Responsibility for the Anxiety I experience and realize that I created this Anxiety and am thus accepting and allowing and so I am able to take Responsibility for this point and and experience within myself and assist and support myself to Stop It.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that if I worry about money and experience anxiety about money, that this is in some way, somehow solving my money situation and will make it so that I make sure I have enough money to survive/live

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I do not have the ability to make something of my life and actually have some success but have simply held onto this idea that “I will always struggle”

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to worry about things instead of taking practical steps to direct the point I am worrying about, where essentially here I have accepted and allowed myself to believe not only is it necessary to worry about things but that worrying in some way actually does something, not considering the common sense that only real physical actions ever move anything, worrying does not actually do anything practical in terms of moving any point along, and so is simply not necessary at all.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to direct myself to physically act and move the practical points of my reality instead of worrying about them, I realize worrying does nothing practical and so here I commit myself to instead of worrying about my life and worrying about different various points within my life to rather Direct Myself Physically within my reality, focusing on simply being here in and as breath and directing and moving myself practically physical, this way also I will not have time to worry as I am now busy practically directing myself and so here also I commit myself to when and as I am practically moving myself to Direct me to be here and be Stable in terms of not going into the mind but rather to just be here in my physical body/the physical,  breathing, Silent, and Directing/Moving the point at hand.

 

Basic Income Guaranteed – An Economic Solution Presented by the Equal Life Foundation
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime
desteni.org – Participate in Forums or Search the Vast Desteni Material
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
equalmoney.org – Learn What Equal Money is all about and Vote on Goals and Principles
Equal Life Foundation – Facebook Stream for Unfolding Events and Soluitons.
Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
Heavens Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s