I really enjoyed spending time with Bernard Poolman. One of my favorite things to do with him was to go shopping! During my stay on the farm he was consistently the one who would do the food shopping for everyone and occasionally he would ask you to go with him. That was like the best – lol.
Those are some of my most fondest memories with Bernard. You see, the drive to town was around 30 minutes. That means during that 30 minutes the potential for your entire world to be turned upside down was quite good because with Bernard he could do that with a single word. So yes, I really enjoyed the shopping trips to town with him.
Sometimes you’d get going and he’d say nothing but just stare ahead and drive, and then your mind starts “going off”
“why is he saying nothing”
“did I do something wrong”
“Andrew stop thinking”
“Oh my god he can hear me blabbing on in my mind”
“he can tell I am nervous, shit”
“I hope I am not making him uncomfortable”
“Ok breathe Andrew, breathe”
“its Ok just look out the window – you are fine”
Or you’d here
“So” with a long pause afterwards. Then normally came a question of some kind that was impossible to answer. Like “What are you Protecting?” Then Id look inside myself “what am I protecting?” Id think, then a safe bet was to just repeat the question back to him as another question – lol.
He used to roll the ‘r’ in my name
“Andrew the Artist” he’d often call me.
Bernard rarely listened to music while he drove – If he was not talking then it was just quiet.
Though I do remember one trip where he had this one CD which he seemed to enjoy and he really blasted it and then would play some of the songs and then get half way through and then switch to the next song – it was all quite humorous really – but mostly it was just either him talking or silence with his intense eyes focused on the dusty road driving just fast enough to make you a bit nervous but with Bernard Driving you kind of trusted him to stay on the road.
He called me on it one time when I reached up to grip that little handle thingy that is sometimes above the window – “Fear of Death!” – I claimed I was just using it for support so I don’t slide around.
I remember one time he had me taking notes in the car while driving. There was never a moment where he was not supporting those around him to become better and more effective within their application. In this case I was jotting down notes about the points he was speaking about to then later put this into a document and post it.
Going to town with Bernard was like winning the lottery – lol – at least for me. As I said, sometimes there was silence but really that would not last for long – he would always have something to say – and mostly he would have ALLOT to say. Then you’d get to the mall or wherever and he wouldn’t shut-up – lol – you’d be walking beside him through the mall and he’d be explaining how consciousness works and the changes in existence and what this all means and you’d only hear half of what he was saying due to all the noise and commotion of being at the mall so Id just do my best to hear as much as possible.
Bernard had a way of explaining things in a way that you could understand. It was like when he was explaining it, the points would be so clear. He understood and often referred to the point of not speaking over someone, like you’d see for instance with some intellects using big words that know one understand to make themselves appear smart – Bernard never did this. He made a point of speaking in a way that could be understood by all. A Common Language is Common Sense.
Normally once you’d get to town you’d go for breakfast and coffee at ‘Whimpy’ the local restaurant . We’d walk in and go straight to the back to the smoking booth and sit in there, and there in that small smoke filled room while sipping on coffee and waiting for our breakfast to come – I had some of the most interesting conversations of my life. Then the waiter would come by and He’d order another coffee and inside myself I jumped for joy because that meant more talking, or really for me it meant more listening.
For me it was never just one thing that Bernard did that stands out. It was so many things. When I first started building things at the farm I remember this one instance Bernard and I were in one of the recently finished rooms and we were talking about a large cupboard that I was planning to build as per Bernard’s suggestion.
Bernard kept insisting that I build it bigger and that I bolt it directly into the room, because this way “it would be a Permanent Solution”. He like Permanent Solutions. It was a point of realization for me in that moment of how to approach applying myself and to push myself to always look for permanent solutions – something that is going to be there for the long haul. So I built a massive fucking dresser we could hardly get it in the door – I think I actually went to big with that thing – But Bernard wanted it big – lol.
I really enjoyed also doing the recordings with Bernard. What I found interesting with him is like he made every moment seem important. Like every moment had value. He NEVER Rushed. So when you’d sit down to have a conversation with him or when he’d do a recording, you’d really have to prepare yourself. Sometimes you’d end up siting for hours. And just listening and realizing how there is so much to this reality that you had not considered. So before we started often the Kitchen would be bustling as everyone was busy getting their coffees and getting ready for what could be a nice long chat. I was always fascinated at how long Bernard could actually speak for, sometimes it would go on for hours and he’d just keep going, speaking his words in absolute clarity.
So I will end it here.
‘All I ask’, he’d say ‘is that you do for others what I have done for you’
Will do….or rather “Yes I will do that” ( He preferred clear direct statements)
Thank You Bernard.
Thank you for being that which I never imagined possible – and showing me that it is.
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