I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear changing my life/the patterns I live and in this giving up ‘energy’ as the energy I generate within me through participating within my life in a specific way, where I fear giving up this energy as I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I require energy to function where if I don’t have energy then I will not be able to function properly.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that If I stop participating within particular patterns and thus energy experiences that I normally do, that this will make my life harder and make it more difficult for me to function and so instead of pushing through that phase where I “feel lethargic or having no energy or motivation” I just give up and go ahead and repeat the same patterns because apparently I need this energy to function in my daily life where without it I will become ineffective and not be able to handle the daily walking and living of my life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am not able to functionally effective without energy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always ‘go back’ and give into the mind to get that energy fix where in this my excuse is “because otherwise I will not be able to function” and so here I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to simply Live in a Self Directed Way, and if I get stuck within a point of feeling “low energy” or “unmotivated” to rather than just go ahead and give into the mind and revert back to the existing within and charging the necessary systems that I have become so accustomed to, to rather move myself into applying the tools of Breath, Self Willed Movement in Breath, Writing, Self Forgiveness, and Self Corrective Application to thus assist and support myself to actually Stop feeding my mind/mind systems within the accepted and allowed believe that “its easier to just charge up the mind” to facilitate my functionality which I see as more the easy way out instead of actually realizing I am actually able to Direct me in a Self Directed Manner, it just takes me getting up and doing what ever task is required to do where here I can assist and support myself within breath to not give into the point of “experiencing myself as functionally ineffective” but to assist and support myself to move/direct myself as a Self Willed Decision, not waiting for or wanting to have Stimulation as Energy in the mind motivating and fueling me within my Daily Living.
When and as I see myself speaking within myself within my back-chat that “I need energy to be functional” I stop and I breathe. I see that this is in fact an excuse that I am telling myself and accepting. I realize that I do not require energy to be functional, particularly within the context of addictions. Meaning I see that especially these points are ‘excess’ and not fundamental to human functioning and so its more like ‘overload’ in a way like trying to shock or charge the body to move and function instead of working with the natural chemistry/make-up of the body to simply live here within the simplicity of the human physical body system where I can look at something like nutrition as an ‘alternative’ to when I am “feeling low energy” instead of just going for that quick fix where I justify this by telling myself that “I need the energy to be functional” I see this is not the case as I have lived many months previously where I was in fact able to function just fine within my reality without ‘needing’ energy to function, but that I simply would direct myself.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to move myself within breath. Where when and as I see myself ‘feeling tired or unmotivated’ in such moments I focus on my breath/breathing and simply direct/move myself within the task at hand, no more accepting and allowing myself to go into the whole experience of “I need energy to be functional” where I will really go into this experience of like “being unmotivated” and like dragging myself around, attempting to manipulate myself into just “giving me what I want” as energy, even if that mean abusing my human physical body, due to what I must do/consume to get that energy fix.
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