This blog is a continuation/extension of my blog from yesterday – Day 384
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to dwell in tiredness, and/or in a ‘sleepy state’ instead of directing myself to ‘get out of it’ and moving in my day.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to create the idea that “I need sleep” where I will think about or imagine ‘how nice it would be to sleep in’ where this is something that I will actually ‘look forwards to and plan for’
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed sleep as a ‘state’ to control me and have power over me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to sleep rather than be awake as much as possible so that I can be directing my physical practical world as effective as possible, where I could be up and applying myself in tasks that would support the practical stability of my life.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to stop participating in ‘daydreaming’ or ‘thinking about’ sleeping where I will go into my mind and think/daydream/imagine me sleeping where in this I will experience a kind of relief within myself, which indicates that an aspect of my ‘wanting to or desiring sleep’ because sleep has been for me a kind of ‘relief’. Particularly where it has become a relief from facing the point of walking in my world, and walking my day to day tasks which I can at times find to be grueling or tiring or exhausting where I have not yet established myself effectively within a point of consistent stability in breathe during my days to the degree where I am no more ‘wanting relief’ from this, where I would then ‘turn to’ sleeping or imagining about sleeping.
Interestingly enough – if I would get up earlier then this would actually assist and support with alleviating this point of ‘tiredness’ and ‘exhaustion’ which I see is often related to ‘Not Having Enough Time” and so for instance when I sleep in that extra hour, its like suddenly there is more of a ‘time-crunch’ and then its like I am rushing my way through the day, so here its interesting as actually Sleeping is more creating the ‘experience of tiredness and exhaustion.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to start my day earlier by getting up earlier where when I have a day off work, I take that not as an ‘opportunity’ to sleep in, but as an Opportunity to actually get up early and give myself direction so that I can actually take my time and relax a bit more in my day in the tasks I am doing, essentially giving myself the time that is required to facilitate me walking Slowly, Deliberately and HERE within the tasks/points I walk/face during my day, so that I am not, when I sleep in, feeling like I must just rush through them in this, not actually being effective in those tasks because I am now just trying to rush through everything because I don’t feel like I have enough time because I slept in, instead of utilizing that time more effectively to, putting that time into decisions and actions which I can spend time with and ensure that it is/they are walked HERE in Self Presence, which is what does NOT happen when I am feeling rushed for time which is a side-effect of sleeping in.
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