The point I am looking at here is the point of Stability. I have noticed a repeating pattern in my life of having a ‘weekly crash’ where in the beginning of the week I am Stable and then as I move later into the week I become more ‘restless’ and more ‘anxious’ and then these experiences intensify until I crash and abandon my responsibilities and just want to ‘hide away from it all’.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist within the cycles of my mind, and thus subject to the fluctuations of the mind as my inner mental reality instead of establishing myself HERE in and as the physical.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to reach a point each week where ‘I cannot take it’ and ‘cannot handle it’ and in this go into a form of hiding or trying to escape from facing my reality, where I have accepted this weekly pattern instead of utilizing the tools of writing, self forgiveness and self corrective application to support myself to develop stability within myself to Stand and face myself and my reality within a point of consistency instead of accepting and allowing myself to repeat the ‘weekly crash’ pattern.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as ‘fine’ yet, repeating the same ‘weekly crash’ so must investigate the thoughts/thought patterns I participate within throughout the week that actually lead up to the eventual point of ‘giving into the mind’ and going into a form of ‘wanting to escape and hide from my reality’ because ‘I cannot take it’ where I see that I have the tendency to look for stability within my mind instead of establishing myself as Stability in and as the physical and then so this ‘mind stability’ will quickly shift to an instability and I will go along with it where thus, when I define myself as ‘fine’ I must determine if this ‘fine’ is related to the mind, like when you give a child a sweet, the child is fine, but if you take away the sweet then the child is not fine thus, the ‘fine’ was no really ‘fine’
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to create stability within myself by catering to my mind, and in this become the servant of my mind attempting to keep my mind satisfied at the expense of my Life really, and directing myself practically effective within my Life.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that in the beginning of each week, when I define myself as ‘fine’ and/or ‘rejuvenated’ that that is actually the mind that is now starting the ‘weekly crash’ pattern over again, and that I have in this, utilized this ‘being fine’ in the beginning of the week’ as an excuse to not walk my writings, self forgiveness, and self corrections, and ultimately to not walk my application of self support effectively so to actually assist and support myself to establish Self Stability within and as me Walking my process to be able to Face/Direct/Handle all aspects of my life within a point of Consistency and Constancy and thus not accepting and allowing myself to participate within the ‘weekly crash’ pattern.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to align myself to and as the physical, as my practical reality to establish Self Stability instead of attempting to and trying to do this within my mind where as long as my mind is able I am stable, but as soon as the mind starts going into fluctuations, I am also now no more stable and so here
I commit myself to investigate how to establish Self Stability regardless of the Stability of the mind from the perspective of realizing that the mind is not going to be stable as I no more accept and allow myself to cater to it, it will throw fits, it will throw tantrums, and so thus here I still must assist and support myself to be Stable within myself instead of just giving into these mind tantrums.
I commit myself to stop feeding the mind and catering to the mind so as to attempt to keep the mind stable instead of assisting and supporting myself to Stand and Be Stable even if the mind is ‘throwing a tantrum’ where for instance I do not go into that tantrum, or participate within the Mind Fluctuations but rather assist and support myself to breath and establish Self Stability and Consistency within directing myself HERE within my physical reality within my Responsibilities and stopping accepting and allowing myself to be influenced by the mind, by the ebbs and flows of the mind.
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