One of the more prominent points in my life recently and within the last few months has been the ‘balance between process and system life’. Mainly here the balance between establishing myself within the System of Money and doing my process daily in an effective manner.
I have noticed how over recent months I have tended to more focus on career at times where this would come up as an excuse as to put off doing process related work, where I would dismiss for instance working on an assignment because “I am focusing more on career and job”.
One of the points within all this that I see is that ‘Time’ has become an excuse as to ‘why I am not doing my process’.
“because I don’t have time”
“because I am too busy with work”
I have also utilized the excuse that “my work will suffer if I spend to much time on process”
More in previous years, I found I tended to focus more of my attention on process to the detriment of my actual practical life in terms of Stabilizing myself within the system within a Career.
So not my question is – How do I do both? – How do I effectively do process but still be effective within my Job. How do I do each effective.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the excuse “but if I do process, that will make it harder for me to find work in the system and make money in the system” and so within this statement accepted and allowed myself to postpone walking my process effectively.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I cannot do both work and process effectively and to my utmost potential.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that spending more time on my process and responsibilities with desteni and to myself within my writings and lessons and readings – that spending more time on this will be a detriment to my career/work, and so have limited my participation within my readings/writings/lessons/desteni stuff.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use ‘time in relation to work’ as a convenient excuse to not do my process related stuff daily, where I have come to just accept this as “a convenient excuse” as if it has some validity to it, and so thus us it to put off walking parts of my self process each day, and thus due to this, not really developing a self intimate and effective relationship with myself. Or really get to know myself very well, and ultimately have not Stabilized myself within my “Stopping the Mind” process and really changing me within my self/life/world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear changing me, where I believe that if I start to change me to walk within the principle of equality and oneness and what is best for all, that this will be detrimental to my job/career, and thus the money I make in my life.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that there is in fact NO excuse that is valid enough to justify limiting oneself and stopping oneself from living to their utmost potential.
I commit myself to remember that this process I am walking is for me to develop an effective relationship with myself and actually getting to know myself inside and out. Within this I am actually empowering myself through by getting to know myself and how I function and create myself and this world. I realize here also that no amount of money can buy Actual Self Awareness, but that Actual Self Awareness must be developed through Self Investigation through for instance Self Writing in a Disciplined manner to actually ensure one is really getting to know oneself and how one is creating self and this world.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to basically ‘forget about myself’ and think ‘naaawww, I’ll do it later’ and in this deny myself the opportunity daily to really get to know myself on a much more intimate level than I now know myself on, which from my perspective will actually lead to self empowerment and self effectiveness within this world. As in getting to know myself I within this will be able to and will become the Directive Principle of me directing all parts of me all moments in a way that is best for ALL life.
I commit myself to ‘flag-point’ this ‘excuse’ I give myself as to why I would put off doing my process related work in a given moment where the ‘excuse’ is that “I am focusing on work and career” and so to flag-point this to ensure that I am not just ‘throwing that excuse ‘out there’’ and automatically accepting it as I see that that is what I had been doing, and so here, I commit myself to realize that Establishing a Self-Honest Relationship with myself and LIVING is the most beneficial thing I can do for myself.