So today I was able to test out the Self Forgiveness and Self Commitments I walked last night, as I was again at work today, and so faced with the same situation/people/person where I noticed myself reacting to.
My primary reaction was in relation to ‘y’ and today I found that I was more stable from the perspective of having some ‘context’ or ‘awareness’ so to speak of my reaction where yesterday I was simply reacting without yet having had the opportunity to sit down with myself and open the point(s) up within writing, self forgiveness, and self commitments.
Another point that is Here that just came up is what I will call a “fear of expectations” I can see this coming up within me when I heard ‘n’ speaking to someone about “what I was up to”
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react in fear within myself when I herd ‘n’ speaking about “what I was up too”
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into an experience of anxiety and fear when I herd ‘n’ speaking positively about me and what I was up, where in hearing ‘n’ speak positively about what I was up to, I went into a fear of “losing this opportunity” and in that moment when into my imagination and started to play out a scenario where I was seeing me “having lost the opportunity” that I am now in which ‘n’ was speaking positively about, and then seeing me in this “having lost this opportunity” context, in relation to ‘n’s positive words about me, which only further fueled my experience of fear within me. A fear of losing the opportunity that I am currently walking.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see how much fear I have in relation to ‘losing this opportunity’ which can be seen in how I reacted in fear when hearing ‘n’ talk about what I was doing “in a positive way”
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that in ‘n’ speaking about what I am doing, will actually cause the point to fall and I will lose the opportunity where I have formed this idea that the more people talk about it, then the more likely it is fall, where this is kind of like a superstition fueled by fear.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear jinxing myself where I have in this generated this kind of fear and anxiety within me, like walking on egg shells.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have created this “walking on egg shells” experience of fear within me, because I fear negativity, where the ‘opportunity’ I now am walking represent a positive, a ‘positive’ that is so rare in my life experience that I fear losing it, that I fear it slipping from my fingers, and I will have to return to the NEGATIVE.
And so I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, or understand that my anxiety and fear that I am experiencing in relation to ‘losing the opportunity I am now it’ has been formed in relation to my life and experience of Negativity which In a way I have become possessed by, where its like the Negative has become a point within my life and world that is inescapable, that is lurking around every corner, that is the thief in the night that eventually slips through the cracks and takes over. It is inescapable, inevitable.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to stop existing within the polarity relationship of positive and negative, and within this, spending my life trying to run from the Negative. I see, realize, and understand that we has humanity as individuals have not stood together and each one Living in such a way that when and as ALL live this way, bring forth a world that is best for all, and thus is not abundant with NEGATIVITY due to the Physical Circumstances that we have accepted and allowed to exist in our Home as Planet Earth.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to become a Living Expression that if Lived by all would eradicate all Negativity from the Physical Conditions of our Life from the perspective of “we can do better than this” where for instance an Equal Money System would assist and support the corrections and transformation of our HOME as Planet Earth to a place that is BEST FOR ALL, where ALL have the basic LIFE CONSTITUTION Provided by a SYSTEM that is in fact grounded and based within Principles that is Best for ALL, not only based on “what is best for just a few elite” like our current system.
I see that I cannot escape the physical negativity that exist in this world as it is EXTENSIVE, and that this point should not be ‘escaped’ per se, but rather I commit myself to assist and support myself to LIVE in a way that FACE the Physical Conditions of Planet Earth in such a way where I am doing my part to Correct and change our World to a place that is best for all, where inevitably we will require the implementation of an Equality Based System such as The Equal Money Capitalism as being proposed by the Desteni Group.
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