Subtle Excuses To “Get Out of Work” – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 340

So tomorrow is my last day at my current job before I take some time, potentially permanently, to work a different job. I was looking at the point of taking a day or two off before I start the new point but have decided to rather just work because the jobs are closed to being finished and it makes sense that I simply stick around and support the point of the jobs getting done.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that “i need time to prepare” instead of simply walking in breath within the tasks that I must do and utilize my time effectively to prepare when and where I have the time.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to just want to leave the jobs i currently have and “get it over with” instead of walking HERE and Doing what needs to be done in an effective manner so thus meaning, that I am constant and simply apply myself as I always do on the job, realizing that I will have enough time to stabilize myself, rest, and prepare myself effectively for the new endeavor the following day, it will simply require Self Direction, and stepping out of my normally accepted routine of what I normally do after work.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear “not being prepared” and in this accepting and allowing anxiety to build up within me as an experience moving within my solar plexus when looking at the point of going to work tomorrow and wondering if I will have enough time after work to prepare for the next day.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to stop participating with the experience of anxiety that is coming up within me in relation to the point of “what if I don’t prepare effectively or have enough time” and that when and as I see this experience coming up within me to assist and support me to stabilize myself by breathing and bringing myself HERE into and as my Human Physical Body as I see that going into an experience of anxiety about this point will not change the physical facts that I am facing, and thus only make things ‘worse’ so to speak.
I see that I have also encountered this kind of experience within me before coming up as a “Not Enough Time” Character. I see that all I really require to do in this situation is to be specific and directive in my time management and direction and I will be fine. I also see that I tend to give myself “more than enough” time in many occasions and actually “too much” time, and so from this perspective the time I have to prepare myself for this upcoming point should be adequate.
I see that also my experience of fear and anxiety is also just ‘nerves’ as I am nervous about the new experience and so again here, I see that within generating and going into this nervousness, I am basing decisions or making my decisions from a reactive starting point, and so here, I commit myself to assist and support myself to breath and and assist and support myself to be HERE in and as the moment, and not going into the ‘nervousness’ and ‘anxiety’ that is coming up in relation to this “new point” and so thus to direct myself into a point of Stability to ensure I am not “coming to decisions” based on reactions/reactive experiences within myself.

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