Seeing Reality for What it Really Is – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 339

So this evening I was speaking on the phone to someone about a point that I was looking at taking on in my life. As I was speaking about it, I was communicating about all the points and I could see that I was quite enthusiastic about this particular point. But what I noticed is that the entire time I was communicating about this point, that there was like a more inherent belief within myself where I believe/believed that “It will never work out” so the entire time as I am speaking and communicating about this point and explaining all the stuff involved, in the background within myself there is like this different “Character” running, so to speak, where its like there is this inherent belief that “its not going to work” where its like this “impending glooming failure” actually existing within me towards the point. So it was just interesting to see these “2 different worlds” like as soon as I got off the phone I could see this “behind the scenes” dialog now more prominently.
So the question I have is
Which one is Real?
Or which on is Dominant.
So quite interesting to notice this. That in my direct communication I was quite enthusiastic but once the conversation was over, it was like this gloomy, doomy, doubtful, aspect of my perceptions around this point that I was discussing, emerged.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I have many characters within me feeding my overall impression or interpretation on points in my world, where its like I am listening to the different “takes” on the points that exist within my world where I eventually form my perception of particular points based on which characters as voices, opinions, emotions, experiences become dominant within me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my inner doubts and doomy and gloomy character to come out and ruin opportunities that come up within my world, where in a way I fear that these doomy gloomy voices are right.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be able to tell if I am ‘seeing direct’ or if I am looking at a point through polarity in either sugar coating it with a ‘positive outlook’ or vilifying it with a ‘negative outlook’ and that I have not established a Stability within myself of SEEING DIRECT how things actually are and in this being able to assess effectively without basing my Seeing or Decisions based on my Seeing, on Opinions or Preferences that I have about something that would interfere with actually SEEING DIRECT How things actually are.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to practice SEEING DIRECT, where in this when ever I am walking within my world to observe where and as I am looking through the eyes of polarity where I am seeing things as either negative or positive, instead of simply seeing things for what/how they are directly.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed HOPE to influence what I see and how I see and perceive my world and reality.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to Breath and walk/navigate my world using common sense and to identify where and how I use ENERGY as either a positive or negative to interfere with WHAT IS REALLY HERE, in terms of how I see my Life/Environment.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to establish Stability and Trust within myself in relation to WHAT I AM SEEING, so that I can in fact know that when I look at something in my world that it is not clouded with opinions, judgement, hope, fear, love, positive, negative but that it is a direct seeing of what is really here and that I simply taking into account the practical parts of the equation and Direct myself accordingly to produce the most effective results in a way that is Best for ALL.


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