Fear Dimension of Victimization Character – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 211

comical sense - work. Acrylic, Pencil Crayon on Paper, 8.5x12in, 2009

This blog is a continuation from Day 210

Yesterday I started opening up the point of my “Victimization Character” as how I have accepted and allowed myself to step into this mode of self victimization and basically living this out in my world.

Today I noticed another aspect of the imagination dimension of this character where what I do in an as my Victimization Character is I will start to look for and bring up all the “bad” things that are going on in my world/life where I will take those points and start to “bring them to the fore” so to speak. So I thought this was quite an interesting mechanism of this character where I will in a way start “emphasising” all the apparent/perceived “problems” in my life where “this is not working” and “I don’t have a relationship” and “I don’t have this” and “I don’t have that” etc, ect…

Self Forgiveness

Fear Dimension

Fear of Having No time for Me/Myself
Fear of having no freedom
Fear of Change
Fear of lose of comfort

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I am faced with the responsibilities of my life/world/day, go into fear of having no time for myself and within this activate my victimization character where I will go into this character instead of actually moving/directing myself within my responsibilities. And so thus I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that within accepting and allowing myself to be directed by this fear of having no time for myself when facing my responsibilities that I end up not directing myself effectively and ultimately diminishing myself through by never actually assisting and supporting myself to in fact become effective and directive within myself and within my reality as the process of assisting and supporting myself to in fact stand equal and one with/as the physical moving and directing myself within and as what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I am not capable of in fact directing myself in and as breath equal and one with the physical, and that this is actually beyond me, thus fearing that I will always be ineffective and trapped within a point of being ineffective, and so thus end up creating myself as this, due to within allowing this fear to direct me where eventually I will go into this fear once I have “had enough” of directing myself in my world, where this fear also become a convenient excuse to “not have to direct myself to take responsibility for myself within my world and directing myself in a self responsible manner in every moment” not having to do this anymore because “apparently I am not able to” as per my “fear of not being able to do such a point” and now where I can just go into my mind and exist within the comfort zone of my mind, fueling the mind and living in a way that support the mind, instead of directing myself to in fact Stand Up and Step out of the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear no more existing in the mind, where also within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing the “positive energy” experience within my life, where in relation to this I actually fear being miserable forever.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being miserable which I have connected to the point of directing/moving myself in and as the physical within moving/directing myself in every moment to take responsibility for myself and my life, which means moving myself throughout my day to face the responsibilities, no more accepting and allowing myself to shy away from this, or to accept a “fear” as a valid justification for why I should not direct myself effectively within my daily responsibilities.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see/realize/understand that this “fear of misery” is actually a future projection that I am superimposing on what I have made myself believe it will be like to direct myself within facing my responsibilities, though have created this entire idea and fear within my mind only, and is NOT in fact actually how it will be to move myself to face my responsibilities, as this must be walked in real time breath by breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear doing something that I don’t want to do or will not like and so rather will go into self victimization so as to “get myself out of” having to move / direct myself in facing the practical responsibilities of my reality. Within this I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that what is best for all is to direct myself in a way where I take absolute directive responsibility for myself and my reality where I am practically physically HERE in every moment ensuring the practical stability and effectiveness of myself and my reality in every moment, within this not accepting and allowing myself to “step away from” the actual practical physical reality and go into the mind where when I do that I am not longer here and self aware, nor am I directing what must be done as the point of taking responsibility for what is here, and not more “letting someone else do it” or “letting it slide” because “I don’t feel like it” which I have accepted and allowed this “I don’t feel like it” to proliferate throughout my reality thus creating my life and my reality the way it is at the moment as I have never really fully taken responsibility for myself/my life in a way that is best for all and stand as an example for others to follow that if all walk this point of taking self responsibility for ourselves and facing and directing what we have created, we will in this be able to create a world that is effective and best for all where all is guaranteed Life from birth to death, where for instance in living as self responsible human beings we would in fact change the money system to an equal money system, because obviously our current system is NOT based on common sense, but because out entire lives have been created around avoiding responsibility and just having fun, until we in fact change ourselves and start living here, as I see that until I no more accept and allow myself to “victimize” myself at the point of change, that nothing will ever change and I will just continue “stuck” at the same point so to speak.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to Live in a way where I direct myself within and as Self Responsibility taking responsibility for what must be done within and as my world / immediate environment where I look at myself and my life within a practical context and do what must be done to in fact walk/live what is best for all, and within this to no more accept and allow myself to victimize myself when faced with my entire world that I have neglected for some time, due to this looking/seeming like to much, but that then also where this point of victimization ends up becoming extended into my world where I then use this “Victimization Character” to ‘prevent’ myself from taking different various responsibilities within my world, now not only the but the small as well and everything in between, instead of stopping my self victimization and simply directing myself to do/complete my daily responsibilities.

I will continue with more self commitment statements in my next blog

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4 thoughts on “Fear Dimension of Victimization Character – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 211

  1. Pingback: Victimization – Branding Fear as Real : An Artists Journey To Life – Day 212 | An Artists Journey To Life

  2. Pingback: Making It Bigger in My Mind – Victimization Character – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 214 | An Artists Journey To Life

  3. Pingback: Constructing My Dis-empowerment – Victimization Character – An Artists Journey to Life: Day 215 | An Artists Journey To Life

  4. Pingback: Victimization Character – BackChat Dimension – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 216 | An Artists Journey To Life

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