This blog is a continuation and a final conclusion of the following blogs, that I have been walking as the investigation/exploration of and as my “Artist Character”
The Entire “Artist Character” Series
The Feeling of Impending Failure – Where does it come from? – An Artists Journey To Life: Day196
Doubt – Further Explorations – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 195
Exploring How I Create Self Doubt – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 194
Sudden Surges of Anxiety/Fear – An Artists Journey To Life – Day 193
Sinking into Heaviness – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 192
Aligning My Expression with the Physical – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 191
Stepping Out of Track – An Artists Journey To Life Day 190
Sorting out my Past Perceptions about Myself – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 189
Finding Excuses to Hold Back – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 188
Disrupting My Attention – Self Corrections – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 187
Subtly Blaming My Genetics – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 186
It Seems So Easy in my Mind. – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 185
Paralysed by My Fear of People Seeing Me Fail – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 184
Can I Walk Away in My Next Breath – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 179
Fear of Not Meeting Your Expectations – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 178
The Fears of The “Starving Artist” (Self Corrections) – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 177
Mental Instability VS Physical Stability : An Artists Journey To Life: Day 176
Making a Living with Art/Being an Artist- An Artists Journey To Life: Day 175
Physical Behaviour Dimension
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist within and as the Physical Behaviours of and as My Artist Character, as the specific physical tendencies and characteristics that I live out in relation to and as this Character, looking at specifically here the “fear of not being able to make this point effective in terms of setting it up in a way to generate money” where in relation to this I will live out the physical behaviour dimension of such a Character/Personality where I will purse my lips together tightly and forming a frown on the sides of my mouth, and also where I will slump my shoulders more where in this my entire posture becomes more slouched, and also I will actually paint/do art allot less in where I will actually Not Paint/Stop doing art not bothering to even pick up the brush, this as the physical behaviours of and as my Artist Character in relation to the fear of “not being able to make this point work effectively in a financially sustainable way.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be influenced by my Mind Character / Artist Character where in the various dimensions of the mind existent within me will in essence take over completely and this will influence me in my practical physical living, thus the directive principle of me within this point, where in my Actual Physical Behaviours will “follow suit” be influenced to the degree where they have become Dependent on the mind to determine for instance when and where I feel, based on how I experience myself within and as my Artist Character – In this actually having abdicated my Physical Practical Responsibility as Directive Principle of myself to Direct myself within this point in a Consistent Sustained way that is practically necessary for this point to work practically, but that I will in fact compromise this sustained practical physical self movement through by accepting and allowing myself as my physical behaviours to be influenced by the mind and the energy I experience within me where I will allow this to determine my physical behaviours/movements/practical application within this point, which then becomes inconsistent and compromised.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to take back my Directive Principle within and as my Practical Physical Behaviours/Application within this point of doing art where in I stop accepting and allowing my physical movements/behaviours/application within this point to be determined by the mind where in essence it is me as the Mind as my Artist Character that is deciding when and where I paint based on the various play-outs/movements/experiences of/as the mind dimensions of the character, instead of this being me walking/moving/physically applying myself within this point in a consistent way based on a practical consideration of what is necessary for making this point work, but that this consideration gets highjacked by my Artist Character, where I accept and allow myself to step into this Character, and thus this taking me within my practical physical application into a NON-Application as now I am subject to the highs and lows of this Character to initiate/direct my Application/Physical Behaviour within my art application and so thus –
I commit myself to assist and support myself to step out of my “Artist Character” as I see that this character’s application within and as Art Making is dependent on the mind dimensions of this Character which creates instability and basically a roller coaster of ups and downs, where for instance in a moment I am taken to a sadness experience in and as my reaction dimension and so then stop painting, where then I am needing a more positive experience to again build up the motivation needed to start painting again, instead of being able to Develop a Consistent Application of this where I Direct me within this based on a practical necessity of what is required and thus work it into my Schedule, not more accepting and allowing my mind to determine the Schedule I follow in terms of my Art making application.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to leave the responsibility of this Art Point to and as My “Artist Character” where then the application of myself within this point, whether it be in the actual art making process or the financial side of things is left to the direction/determination/influence of my Artist Character and thus the Mind, where then the consequence of doing this is that I never end up following through with this point in a practically sustainable way because the nature of the mind and this character is to in fact give up and become subject to energy and emotional reactions and the various dimensions of the mind which always end up sabotaging a REAL Stable Practical Solution based on a Practical Application Determined and Lived in Common Sense and Consistency.
I commit myself to STOP participating within and as my Artist Character as a way to Support myself within Developing a Practically Sustainable and Effective use of my Art Skills within the context of this world / money system. And thus I commit myself to assist and support myself to Direct Myself based on Principle where I in this assist and support me to move me through resistances and “not wanting to do it’s” and to within this Align my Physical Application within this point to being a Consistent Daily application, not something that I either do or not do depending on “how I feel” and so I commit myself to assist and support myself to explore the particular points/experiences which I still accept and allow myself to give into that “throw me off track” so to speak and where I will “rather not paint/do art” but just trust some experience within myself that divert me from remaining consistent within my Art Application of and as the specific determined application arrived at in practically assessing what I will require to do with and as this point to support this in becoming an effectively viable point within my world within the context of money.
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