I don’t wanna Work ‘Character’ – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 148

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to go into immediate resistance today when I got a phone call about a new job where in that moment I realized the conversation I was in was about a job, I immediately reacted within and as myself and went into resistance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react the point of working or having a job where I literally go into a negative reaction straight away without having time to in fact listen to what the job would be about or what it would entail, but simply automatically react in a negative way to any possibility of job or work, where in I have accepted and allowed myself to have formed a negative perception about work/jobs and so thus when ever this possibility comes up my first reaction is primarily and virtually always negative, due to how I have programmed this point within me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto/participate with/maintain my pre-programmed definition of work/job through within accepting and allowing myself to automatically react without actually looking at the point practically

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to after getting a new job for the next month or so, prepare myself to go into reaction because “this is my normal reaction to getting a job” and so started to go into “my normal reaction” which is always negative and bad, and so thus within this I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to re-define the point of Job/Work into equality and oneness and in this stopping my emotional/reaction/pre-programmed response to this point that is literally automated and pre-packaged within me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compare this job to all my previous jobs like this one that I have worked and in doing this go into an experience of anxiety due to my past experiences of working in this field (landscaping).

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will hate my job.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to FEAR my experience of myself at work and so go into Fear at the prospect of having a new job, where my immediate reaction to this is negative and resistance – due to fear that experience that I experienced myself as within working my last jobs and working jobs in general which I have charged with allot of negative energy.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to picture my previous jobs in this field that my new job is in and in, and go into anxiety and fear in relation to this picture, not wanting to “go there” due to how I experienced myself within my last jobs, one aspect of this being related to “how hard they were” as they were physical labour and “how many hours I had to work” and “how I experienced myself after work in relation to How many hours I had left in the day to utilize” where I felt “I will not have enough time to do anything but just will work like a slave” and so in this experience sadness and a sinking/dropping within my solar plexus into my stomach like a heaviness sinking/dropping within me and this sadness/depression come over me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that my experience of myself during/at this job will be exactly like it was in all my other jobs and that there is nothing I can do about it, and within this “idea” experience a sadness/depression/despair within and as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my “experience of myself within working” which is in essence “fearing jobs/work” due to me believing that this makes me miserable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate with negative energy associations towards work/job instead of stopping my pre-programmed responses to working/jobs and simply breath and not accepting and allowing myself to into my “I don’t wanna Work Character” which within experience myself within a negative experience in relation to working/jobs.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I made a mistake and that this is why I am getting a call for job – Where in I fear that I made a mistake and now my reality is forcing me to move due to me not moving me effectively and so when getting a call today about a job, when also here into a point of Self Judgement towards myself, believing that the reason I am getting this call for a job is because I did not do something good enough.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will not have enough time now “to do anything”

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to “experience” myself differently during the day and in the evenings when I have a job vs when I do not have a job, where for instance when I do not have to work the next day I am more lighter and relaxed but if I must work the next day, experience a form of heaviness on me as well as experience a point of depression within me and so here within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become influenced by/through an energetic charge that I have created and placed on ‘work and jobs’

 

I see, realize and understand that my ‘immediate reaction’ was automatic and based on a pre-defined judgement / pre-programmed definition I have created and stored within myself about work. I see this, because this is how I always react respond every time and today I noticed how quickly I went into an energetic reaction towards this point.

I commit myself to assist and support myself to release my energetic reactions in relation to work/job through writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application, so that I can assist and support myself to be stable within the point of work/job so within this I am able to be Self Directive within this point instead of “being told how to react” by my mind as the pre-programmed definitions and programmed responses I have created within myself.

I see, realize and understand that these pre-programmed responses only support me within being a slave to my mind where I react always in exactly the same way and so I assist and support myself to transform these pre-programmed responses to work into Clear Self Directive Decisions in relation to work made in common sense and within the principle of what is best for all. I see, realize, and understand that as long as I accept and allow myself to continue reacting to and being influenced by my programmed energy responses to work/job that this will make it difficult for me to ever become Self Directive within this point.

When and as I see myself going into a pre-programmed energetic response in relation to work/job, I stop and breath and I bring myself back here, realizing that “my experience” in relation to work is a “mind reaction” that I have programmed within me based on my past definitions/values/ideas. And so thus I stop and I breath and do not accept and allow myself to go into the programmed normal reaction that I usually do in relation to work/job. Here I direct myself to remain stable and thus assist and support myself within writing, self forgiveness and self corrective application to deconstruct and discharge any energetic experience and reaction that I have towards doing jobs/work, looking at and investigating how I have created my current definition of work/job that has now become an automated energetic experience that comes up within me and influences me in my decisions related to work/job career.

I commit myself to transform my relationship with work/job so that It stand within the principle of  what is best for all.

DAILY EQAFE SUPPORT INTERVIEW

Life Review – My Life as A Doctor

 Other Desteni Links

desteni.org

eqafe.com

equalmoney.org

desteniiprocess.com

Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs

Heavens Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs

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