I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience a kind of depression as a sadness and sinking within and as myself when I look at the point of work and where I will be in the future and what I will be doing with my life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to hide from this experience I have when I start to look at / ponder where I will be in the future, particularly in relation to work.
I see, realize, and understand that I have not been effectively investigating my experiences of myself from the perspective of actually assisting and supporting myself to no more accept and allow myself to be directed as a slave to energy and experience but to in fact make decisions for myself and direct myself in practical common sense, and so also within this I see to support myself it is effective to deconstruct, take apart my experiences so within doing so understand in detail how I in fact am the creator of myself and my experiences where in doing this Empowering myself to no more be directed by my experiences but become the Director of myself and thus stop participating with energy and experience as the council I walk with which I must always consult in making decisions instead of realizing that I do not require or need energy/experiences to make decisions and guide me in my life and in fact allowing this is only keeping me trapped in my current self programming which I here by commit to assisting and supporting myself to step out of through self investigation and self introspection and getting to know myself and how I created all of me in detail which I do through writing, self forgiveness and self correction and to thus then re-direct myself, not based on some energetic experience that i have that I have never in fact looked at and/or understood but that I simply direct me based on practical common sense.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to a thought/picture that comes up within my mind of seeing me at the exact same job I am working at at the moment where in reacting to this picture I am making the statement that this picture as a projected idea of myself in the future is real.
I forgive myself for not realizing that I was/am reacting to a picture/thought that comes up within my mind of seeing me at the job I am at right now, in the future where in seeing this I react and experience sadness, anger and frustration.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I will be at this job I am working now, next year which I react extensively to from the perspective of going into an experience of sadness, depression and anger within the belief that I will be at this same job next year where I also participate in back-chat within myself towards this picture/point within myself where I have inner conversations with myself around the point of me “being no further ahead” and also “stuck at this same job which will keep me trapped in an endless cycle of being poor” and in relation to this back-chat in relation to the picture that comes up within my mind as seeing me at the same job I am doing now, next year, experience a sinking within myself where I take a heavy sigh and feel stuck, all in relation to a picture/pictures that come up within my mind of me being at the exact same job next year as I am now.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to hide form my experience of myself in relation to work because I believe that things are not going to work out for me and I will just be doing this same job I am doing now over and over again into the future, and in this idea of what will happen, experience a form of depression come over me and the back-chat “I will hate my life”
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am powerless to do anything about my work related experience.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to access hopelessness when I think about work/my job where in I will see a picture come up within me of my bank account and a number amount within my bank account and go into back-chat that “there is no way for me to make money any more money” and that “I will not make any more money” and then go into an experience of hopelessness within myself where I experience like a dropping/sinking of myself and I sigh a heavy breath within the belief that “nothing is going to change for me any time soon”
to be cont…
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