This Blog is an Further Opening up of my “Artist Character” which can be seen as an extension/continuation of the following blog posts.
The Religion of $elf – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 174
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto my “Artist Character” as the way I did art in the past and went about living out this entire character instead of letting go of this Character as all the dimensions that I have existed in and as this character so to support myself to redefine this point for myself in a more practically effective way within the context of what I now understand and am in the process of Aligning myself to Live as the process of understanding how I actually function, and through and within this to Live in a way that is best for all.
I commit myself to Re-Design Myself as My Artist Character from the perspective of the way I approach doing art so that this is updated within the context of supporting what I am now walking at the process of assisting and supporting myself to live and become that which is best for all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I as an artist must work alone.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that working alone produce the best art and is the best way for an artist to work.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to really consider all options when it comes to art making and particularly looking at the various aspects that I MUST explore to support economic return with my art within the context of how the system function.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want people to like my art instead of doing what is effective where I stop pursuing “positive feedback” that make me feel good, which is just an experience inside me that is really not valid within the context of this world and all that is going on at the moment in terms of the state of the world, the system, people, and that it is strange how I could experience joy while millions die of starvation each day, which really makes me question the validity or “REALNESS” of the experience of joy/happiness within me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself live out the exact same pattern/behaviours that are Aligned with my “Starving Artist Character” instead of willing myself to live deliberately in a way that support the re-definition of myself as “an artist” so that I can take into consideration effectively the economic aspects of being an artist and running an art business, something that will require different patterns and behaviours and doings that I have not lived before or lived in terms of how I lived out my artist character in the past.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to isolate myself from others not fully comprehending that I will in fact have to change this aspect/quality about myself within re-shaping/forming my patterns/behaviours within the realm of art making and also within Living in general.
Isolation is probably one of the most prominent points that I have lived throughout my life and I see here how this was one of the base character platforms linked into my “Starving Artist Character” which I call the “Starving” Artist Character by the way because I never made any money in selling my Art – and notably seeing here my unwillingness to actually “make connections” and “stand out” being a definite hindering attribute within the context of selling my Art.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to step out of my isolation character and open myself up to actual REAL PHYSICAL RELATIONSHIPS with others.
I commit myself to assist and support myself to stop existing in isolation as I see that isolating myself from others has been one of my primary behaviours that has fuelled and supported “who I am” as so many of the other various characters I live out, which require me to isolate myself the I have in the past and do currently so to be able to live out such character that are not able to exist so easily within living and participating more actively within actual REAL PHYSICAL Relationships and so thus I commit myself to explore my “Isolation Character” within the context of how this character/living preference has supported me within who I am as how I have created/constructed/ and lived out my Mind Characters, and also looking at this point within the context of my art and how this influenced my art and how to Transform this point so that isolation is no more supporting me as the living out as characters, and also exploring alternatives to interacting/living that would more effectively support me within Re-Establishing my process of Making Art in a way that is Economically Fruitful, and not just like living in a cave making art that no one see’s or understands as it was not considering others within a language of common sense that people can understand and so that I also can ensure am not just cycling around in my mind but actually speaking/communicating deliberately and specifically with my Art, no more accepting the “searching for something” approach that instead of utilizing this approach in a constructive way I just used it as a means to an end always searching for something and never directing myself into full understanding and deliberate placement/Direction.
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